Worse:
"Let's all LARP with sirpercival!"
I think I might win the thread already:
"Let's all LARP with FATAL."
"Then Nerull starts the striptease..."
(click to show/hide)
"Everyone must take the VoP"
"Vow of Poverty is Mandatory."First
"You meet in a tavern" :blinkYou win.
"I want to run 4e"
"I don't care about rules"
"I love critical fumble tables"
"You'll get to meet Elminster!"
~Worst thing to hear in an FR game for a female PC.
"You'll meet rule 63 Elminster!"
"Tonight: we plan Bella's wedding"
"You get minimum hit points."LOL
"Roll to save versus orgasm."LOOOL
"Porno in character, starring Evard""Evard and Bigby did that"
"Now, roll for anal circumference..."
"Core only. It's more balanced."
"The final boss is Pun-pun."
"The story is all Giovanni." (Toredor would be just as bad)
"new guys are Brazilian Cops" :)
Tonight: "Adventures designed by Gary Gygax" (I will so go Tomb of Horrors on my PC's someday)
"The final boss is Pun-pun."Yeah, I'm rather looking forward to that one. (http://www.minmaxboards.com/index.php?board=46.0) :D
"...and suddenly, thousands of cat-girls!"
Speaking of which"...and suddenly, thousands of cat-girls!"
Sounds like something Bhu would say...
Speaking of which"...and suddenly, thousands of cat-girls!"
Sounds like something Bhu would say...
"bhu came up with it"
Would fill me with horror and great anticipation at the same time
Hey now!-_-' :whistle Ehm... sure I mean it's not like I'm trying to imply something like tha... Oh look! A flying sausage!*runs off*
I am a perfectly normal kitty, with no mental deficiencies of any kind :D
really i swear...
Dragonwrought Kobolds on dire weasels...
Dragonwrought Kobolds on dire weasels...
FTFY.
Yes but most of your stuff should only be used in context. Out of Context, it can ruin a session. Also, we should be careful about the references to people here, someone might use it as an excuse to flame.
"I don't understand CR, but..."
... Oh look! A flying sausage!
... Oh look! A flying sausage!
My water just broke again.
PrC's cost 400 wizard points
"Random encounter! Rolled the Tarrasque." <-- This one happened to me when the party was level 7.
"Fuck it. I'm gettin' nekkid."
"Random encounter! Rolled the Tarrasque." <-- This one happened to me when the party was level 7.
Oh, you guys were probably fine. Did you have a Druid or a Totemist? Wild Empathy all the way!
"I was reading GNS theory..."Wins thread.
" we normally don`t use dices" (6 words but w/e...)Looks like five to me.
"LOOK AT MAH JIGGLY BUTT!" (http://www.illwillpress.com/jigg.html)
"Heavily house-ruled second edition."Is there any other way to play 2E? :P
(I just got myself into one of these games, but given the context, I'm hoping it will be fun.)
"My name's Sean K. Reynolds":lmao :lol Thread over.
"My name's Sean K. Reynolds":lmao :lol Thread over.
"My name's Sean K. Reynolds":lmao :lol Thread over.
:???
"My name's Sean K. Reynolds":lmao :lol Thread over.
:???
http://www.seankreynolds.com/ (http://www.seankreynolds.com/)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sean_K._Reynolds (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sean_K._Reynolds)
http://paizo.com/people/SeanKReynolds (http://paizo.com/people/SeanKReynolds)
Educate thyself... ^^
Short version? :pA designer of D&D who doesn't know much about D&D. Take a look at his feat point system (http://www.seankreynolds.com/rpgfiles/misc/featpointsystem.html) to get an idea of how little he understands the game. The guy rates Quicken Spell and Natural Spell at 5 points each and Skill Focus at 10 points. He literally thinks getting Skill Focus is as good as getting Quicken Spell and Natural Spell for your Druid.
Short version? :pA designer of D&D who doesn't know much about D&D. Take a look at his feat point system (http://www.seankreynolds.com/rpgfiles/misc/featpointsystem.html) to get an idea of how little he understands the game. The guy rates Quicken Spell and Natural Spell at 5 points each and Skill Focus at 10 points. He literally thinks getting Skill Focus is as good as getting Quicken Spell and Natural Spell for your Druid.
his proposed deconstruction was interesting, regarding natural spell and quicken, he notes that from a design perspective they are limited to and only apply to specific classes, as opposed skill focus which can be used by everyone. also, in the case of quicken, it is limited by what level one is in addition to class. however, i think that while that is one valid viewpoint, the end result upon the game of said feats also needs to be taken into consideration. for example, skill focus on climb or jump = not much. skill focus on bluff or diplomacy = noticeable effect. skill focus on UMD = very noticeable to huge effect. quicken spell = huge effect. natural spell = huge effect. and so on.
that list is insane.Short version? :pA designer of D&D who doesn't know much about D&D. Take a look at his feat point system (http://www.seankreynolds.com/rpgfiles/misc/featpointsystem.html) to get an idea of how little he understands the game. The guy rates Quicken Spell and Natural Spell at 5 points each and Skill Focus at 10 points. He literally thinks getting Skill Focus is as good as getting Quicken Spell and Natural Spell for your Druid.
thanks for the link. i decided to challenge him on it, we'll see what he says.The worst part is, he doesn't understand why that thinking is so stupid. By that logic, Greater Weapon Specialization is even more rare than Quicken Spell, in that only one class can take it, and at an even higher level. Never mind all the dead levels and other bad feats that have to get dumped into it.
his proposed deconstruction was interesting, regarding natural spell and quicken, he notes that from a design perspective they are limited to and only apply to specific classes, as opposed skill focus which can be used by everyone. also, in the case of quicken, it is limited by what level one is in addition to class.
I guess I'm getting off topic from the thread, but I think those five words would be some of the worst I could hear in a game. Although, I would give first place to the "your character wouldn't do that" line. ;)
"Suck my dick for XP?"
Yeah, meaning its optional
otherwise they can get it. The 'old fashioned' way :P
Yeah, meaning its optional
otherwise they can get it. The 'old fashioned' way :P
bah. gardening is older.
Yeah, meaning its optional
otherwise they can get it. The 'old fashioned' way :P
bah. gardening is older.
"Plough My Fields For XP."
Insert suggestive winking.
Yeah, meaning its optional
otherwise they can get it. The 'old fashioned' way :P
bah. gardening is older.
"Plough My Fields For XP."
Insert suggestive winking.
hmmm, tending a garden is even older than ploughing fields, if you get right down to the root of the concept.
'Tend my Garden' isn't as suggestive.
Short version? :pA designer of D&D who doesn't know much about D&D. Take a look at his feat point system (http://www.seankreynolds.com/rpgfiles/misc/featpointsystem.html) to get an idea of how little he understands the game. The guy rates Quicken Spell and Natural Spell at 5 points each and Skill Focus at 10 points. He literally thinks getting Skill Focus is as good as getting Quicken Spell and Natural Spell for your Druid.
To be fair, it was written really early in 3rd Edition history.Third edition was already at least three years old when this was written, because Natural Spell is listed in there. This was written for at least 3.5. The worst overall trend is that crappy skill and combat feats cost 10 points (the cost of a "normal" feat), but most of the five-pointers are metamagic feats and other feats that are useful only to casters. So, the take home message from this system is that SKR thinks that casters need to get more feats for free; the types of feats that make them more powerful. We already knew casters were awesome on 2003.
I invited Gamer Zero over.
But true.I invited Gamer Zero over.
Harsh :D.
"Roll to determine asshole diameter."
I invited Gamer Zero over.
Harsh :D.
But true.
"Roll to determine asshole diameter."
"My mustache smells like cabbage.""My cabbage smells like moustache."
"I made houserules for FATAL"
"I made houserules for FATAL"
Is there any conceivable way that could make it worse?
"I made houserules for FATAL"
Is there any conceivable way that could make it worse?
"I made houserules for FATAL"
Is there any conceivable way that could make it worse?
More detailed anal circumference rules?
"I made houserules for FATAL"
Is there any conceivable way that could make it worse?
More detailed anal circumference rules?
Short version? :pA designer of D&D who doesn't know much about D&D. Take a look at his feat point system (http://www.seankreynolds.com/rpgfiles/misc/featpointsystem.html) to get an idea of how little he understands the game. The guy rates Quicken Spell and Natural Spell at 5 points each and Skill Focus at 10 points. He literally thinks getting Skill Focus is as good as getting Quicken Spell and Natural Spell for your Druid.
Leadership is 8 points.
That is all.
A designer of D&D who doesn't know much about D&D. Take a look at his feat point system (http://www.seankreynolds.com/rpgfiles/misc/featpointsystem.html) to get an idea of how little he understands the game. The guy rates Quicken Spell and Natural Spell at 5 points each and Skill Focus at 10 points. He literally thinks getting Skill Focus is as good as getting Quicken Spell and Natural Spell for your Druid.
Leadership is 8 points.
That is all.
Oh wow, look at that link now. He's taken it down and left a message. The butthurt is strong in this one.
And for title of the thread...
"The Lady of Pain enters...."
Ahahahahaaaahhaa!
Yeah, he handled that in about the whineiest way possible.
Holy crap my Constitution is enormous.
Ahahahahaaaahhaa!
Yeah, he handled that in about the whineiest way possible.
Perhaps, but seeing it from his perspective it can get soul-crushing if you're continually mocked and insulted for a variant ruleset you made a decade ago. Even if it is a bad ruleset, a lot of game designers over the years made some really crappy stuff without it turning into an "everything that's wrong with their game design philosophy."
Anyway, contributing to the thread:
"Dick size determined by Constitution."
Tomb of Horrors, no paper.
2nd Edition, but NO houserules
2nd Edition, but NO houserules
*DM supposedly calls player to act on his turn, but player is dead*Dafuq kind of gaming group is this?
"Oh, you are already dead."
The hardcore kind?*DM supposedly calls player to act on his turn, but player is dead*Dafuq kind of gaming group is this?
"Oh, you are already dead."
"We're larping with real weapons."
"I'm aiming for gritty survival"
(Discussion about a low-level Commoner run... think that's all my bad campaigns...)
We'll do play-by-post.:bigeyes
"Remember to wear a rubber""That's what your mom said." :P
"What was your HP, again?"I've been on both sides of the screen for that one. :P
I homebrewed FATAL LARP rulesI do believe this wins the thread, though...
I homebrewed FATAL LARP rulesI do believe this wins the thread, though...
I think I might win the thread already:
"Let's all LARP with FATAL."
"Roll reflex save against acid."Reminds me of a heavily houseruled 2E game (like they all were, out of necessity). The monk with 67 HP gets hit by acid from a dragon for 60 points of damage, and rolls his save vs Breath Weapon for half.
Gives me nightmares.
dang ninja'd :ninja ... 2.5 years ago, I know I read it back then tooI homebrewed FATAL LARP rulesI do believe this wins the thread, though...
First post in this thread:I think I might win the thread already:
"Let's all LARP with FATAL."
"New Rule:FTFYNoOnly Rape Dickwolves"
"I've DMed for Kevin Video"
"Randomly roll your character's class."
"You're fighting a dildo golem."
"You're fighting a dildo golem."(click to show/hide)
(click to show/hide)
Or you could just grapple it until it goes limp.(click to show/hide)
It is immune to all magic except repeated, iterative castings of Reduce Person.
"I learned to poop today."
"You find five ethereal felchers."
Thank you."You find five ethereal felchers."
You win.
Thread over.
"You find five ethereal felchers."
"No multiclassing, we'll get confused"I'm cool with pony campaigns and I'm okay with rule-34 campaigns, but not both. *shudders*
"My girlfriend wants to play"
"My little pony rule-34 campaign"
A tarrasque enters the room.
"The dog has explosive diarrhea."
A tarrasque enters the room."The dog has explosive diarrhea."
"The tarrasque has explosive diarrhea."
The diarrhea explodes into tarrasques
No more diarrhea please! The room's full!A tarrasque enters the room."The dog has explosive diarrhea."
"The tarrasque has explosive diarrhea."
The tarrasque explodes into diarrhea.
The diarrhea explodes into tarrasquesNo more diarrhea please! The room's full!A tarrasque enters the room."The dog has explosive diarrhea."
"The tarrasque has explosive diarrhea."
The tarrasque explodes into diarrhea.
The diarrhea explodes into tarrasquesNo more diarrhea please! The room's full!A tarrasque enters the room."The dog has explosive diarrhea."
"The tarrasque has explosive diarrhea."
The tarrasque explodes into diarrhea.
The room's full of diarrhea.
" ...Tarrasque explodes, raining Diarrhea Elementals..."The diarrhea explodes into tarrasquesNo more diarrhea please! The room's full!A tarrasque enters the room."The dog has explosive diarrhea."
"The tarrasque has explosive diarrhea."
The tarrasque explodes into diarrhea.
The room's full of diarrhea.
The diarrhea's full of tarrasque-lings.
This is why the tarrasque eats so much: Its digestive and reproductive systems are the same thing.
" ...Tarrasque explodes, raining Diarrhea Elementals..."The diarrhea explodes into tarrasquesNo more diarrhea please! The room's full!A tarrasque enters the room."The dog has explosive diarrhea."
"The tarrasque has explosive diarrhea."
The tarrasque explodes into diarrhea.
The room's full of diarrhea.
The diarrhea's full of tarrasque-lings.
This is why the tarrasque eats so much: Its digestive and reproductive systems are the same thing.
"...don't let them touch you"
Edit: added to the pyramid
"Son of a f***ing b****!"" ...Tarrasque explodes, raining Diarrhea Elementals..."The diarrhea explodes into tarrasquesNo more diarrhea please! The room's full!A tarrasque enters the room."The dog has explosive diarrhea."
"The tarrasque has explosive diarrhea."
The tarrasque explodes into diarrhea.
The room's full of diarrhea.
The diarrhea's full of tarrasque-lings.
This is why the tarrasque eats so much: Its digestive and reproductive systems are the same thing.
"...don't let them touch you"
Edit: added to the pyramid
"Fort save, Flesh to Diarrhea."
The diarrhea explodes into tarrasques
"Say hello to Mike Huckabee."
The diarrhea explodes into tarrasques"Say hello to Mike Huckabee."
Election explodes into Mike Huckabee.
"My little pony rule-34 campaign":lmao
Watch me hammer this grenade!
"Son of a f***ing b****!"" ...Tarrasque explodes, raining Diarrhea Elementals..."The diarrhea explodes into tarrasquesNo more diarrhea please! The room's full!A tarrasque enters the room."The dog has explosive diarrhea."
"The tarrasque has explosive diarrhea."
The tarrasque explodes into diarrhea.
The room's full of diarrhea.
The diarrhea's full of tarrasque-lings.
This is why the tarrasque eats so much: Its digestive and reproductive systems are the same thing.
"...don't let them touch you"
Edit: added to the pyramid
"Fort save, Flesh to Diarrhea."
"Want some fried kitten testicles?"Somehow, I don't see bhu handling this well...
"Someone else DM next time"Depending on the DM, that might be the best 5 words they could say... :p
"It's home brew for FATAL"
"Isn't Drizz't Do'Urden the coolest?"
"I hate Tome of Battle."
"Everyone, roll up a Truenamer.""I hate Tome of Battle."
"You must use Complete Psionic"
"You are all using Samurai""Everyone, roll up a Truenamer.""I hate Tome of Battle."
"You must use Complete Psionic"
"Flask rogues are too powerful.":lmao
"I hate Tome of Battle."
"I hate Tome of Battle."
O.o do you know my DM? He said those exact words... several times...
"no homebrew but my homebrew"
This one is actually really common, even in official settings. Dark Sun, Dragonlance, or any other heavily customized setting springs to mind.True, but i generally see it mixed in with the others combined with horrible restrictive creation rules and broken dmpc's. you know, the sort of dm who punishes you for "covering your weaknesses" (by doing things like asking if you can buy a resistance item for something you have a weakness in) then makes a prc for his npc that gets true strike at will. I generally hear the phrase then start checking for conductor hats to be safe.
True, but i generally see it mixed in with the others combined with horrible restrictive creation rules and broken dmpc's. you know, the sort of dm who punishes you for "covering your weaknesses" (by doing things like asking if you can buy a resistance item for something you have a weakness in) then makes a prc for his npc that gets true strike at will. I generally hear the phrase then start checking for conductor hats to be safe.
Randomly determined race and class!3d6, in order, no rerolls.
3d6, in order, no rerolls.
3d6, in order, no rerolls.
AAAAHHHH I've actually done that. We were all goblins. Much dying was had.
It was actually really fun. Thankfully we chose classes after rolls, but no casters were allowed. My only positive ability score was charisma, so I convinced him to let me play a Bard1/MarshalX with no spells. I had 4 str and 5 con. We did lots of running away, in true goblin fashion.
It was actually really fun. Thankfully we chose classes after rolls, but no casters were allowed. My only positive ability score was charisma, so I convinced him to let me play a Bard1/MarshalX with no spells. I had 4 str and 5 con. We did lots of running away, in true goblin fashion.
Pleasee tell me one of your party members named their goblin Robin, and (even if none of them did name themselves Robin) you proudly sang "Brave brave Sir Robin, He bravely ran away!"
"I'm restarting the campaign from 10 years ago. Now here is a book with all the changes to my homebrew over the last 10 years. I hope you memorize it."
"I'm restarting the campaign from 10 years ago. Now here is a book with all the changes to my homebrew over the last 10 years. I hope you memorize it."
Come on, that's the best thing a DM could say. It's a good warning.