Author Topic: New guys thread  (Read 26175 times)

Offline bhu

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #60 on: September 14, 2015, 04:16:19 AM »
Quote
He's helping a naive villager avoid killing an abomination so he doesn't fulfill a prophecy, marry a witch and become a tyrant who rules his land with an iron fist.  Should pay pretty well.

Pardon, but is the villager marrying the witch, or the boss?

"The villager.  He's prophesied to kill an abomination, marry an evil witch and bring about a new dark age.  Granted this is Florida we're talking about.  The abomination could just be someone of an inappropriate religion, and so could the witch."

Offline Risada

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #61 on: September 14, 2015, 09:40:36 AM »
"And how long until he returns? What are we supposed to do while we wait?"

Offline bhu

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #62 on: September 14, 2015, 05:46:16 PM »
"He should be back today.  In the meantime I can do orientation and go over the appropriate laws that will apply to you while within the city.  And I suppose we should introduce you to Benny and some of the other staff who are here."


"Also sex between the living and the dead is kind of prohibited, so no ghostjobs, free or otherwise."

A disembodied female voice pipes up:  "That is such total bullshit."

"Patience Carmen."

"I'm a grown woman, I should be able to do goofy, disturbing things with whomever I please.  pay or no pay."

"Patience Carmen."

Offline Solo

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #63 on: September 14, 2015, 06:48:05 PM »
"Also sex between the living and the dead is kind of prohibited, so no ghostjobs, free or otherwise."
Does that depend on what the definition of 'is' is?
"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down."

Offline bhu

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #64 on: September 15, 2015, 06:18:08 PM »
"Okay in the basement we have Benny the God of Fear, his serving wench Sassy, and his gopher Dr. Schulz.  They don't leave their room except under certain circumstances, so meeting one of them is generally a sign that something is very very wrong.  In the other downstairs room is our Guild Mage and researcher Bartholomeow and his lab.  Truffles has adopted him.  Seeing Bartholomeow out of his room, or Truffles in view of anyone not in the Guild is also a sign something is very very bad."

"Our Guild membership varies heavily, and some members are missing or not living here.  Given our situation we'd prefer you live here for your safety ad ours.  If anyone claims to be a Guild member, please consult the official Members list here (waves book).  It has everyones name and likeness.  Most of our current members are women.We also have all the lady ghosts on the premises as well, and Ted.  Ted is a ...well we don't know what the Hell Ted is but we've adopted him as a sort of trainee/hired help.  Do not abuse him, he's a nice guy."

"Common visitors will include Sheriff Stefanescu, who won his position by successfully wrestling a Pit Fiend in a death match for the fate of the city.  He has no sense of humor or patience, but is a fair guy as long as you don't piss him off.  We commonly deal with him or his deputies.  Our Guild also has a loose affiliation with the Grigovakis family who own the Broken Kneecap bad and tavern.  They helped us get our start, and in return we help them out too occasionally.  And their regulars.  We also have ties to Goober, the Dretch bartender at the airport monster bar."

"Due to their help on a sensitive issue, the Assassin's Guild occasionally uses our headquarters as a neutral meeting ground/hookup place.  Tell no one.  We may also be getting involved in the current election for the president of the Evil Minion's Union.  Any questions?"

Offline Risada

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #65 on: September 16, 2015, 07:09:30 AM »
Kulgan smiles, a mothful of teeth showing themselves. "I like how the Sheriff does things. Hopefully nothing will go wrong and make him appear at our doorstep. " Then he continues in a more serious fashion. "You mentioned laws we need to follow?"

Offline bhu

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #66 on: September 16, 2015, 04:31:36 PM »
"Yes, that will be trickier.  This is the legal code of Serranian."

She gestures towards what appears to be a small library.

"I am currently the only guild member well versed in it.  In short I am your defense attorney and contract specialist.  I can teach you all of it in bits at a time, or I can just give you the short round needed for day to day operations.  Which would mean you'd need to depend on me for legal advice still.  So far everyone has chosen option number 2."

Offline Solo

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #67 on: September 17, 2015, 02:05:49 AM »
"Arrr..." Jack sighs and pulls out a pad and pen. "What be the rules?"
"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down."

Offline ketaro

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #68 on: September 17, 2015, 02:58:36 AM »
"Well, not killing priests appears to be on top of the list..."

Offline Vladeshi

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #69 on: September 17, 2015, 03:32:36 AM »
"I have this bad feeling that not killing is a large part of the list."
The following explanation has been removed due to time constraints, character limits on posts, and the DC 30 Spellcraft checks to understand large portions of it.

Offline bhu

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #70 on: September 17, 2015, 03:59:47 AM »
"I have this bad feeling that not killing is a large part of the list."

"Yes.  Killing and assault are allowed in self defense only.  Certain magics are restricted or outright forbidden within city limits."

She then launches in to an hours long diatribe on the rules and regulations of the city which she refers to as 'the quicky version'. 

ooc: Those of you with Knowledge Local will now get a better chance of making checks with it.  Those that don't have the skill can still make an Int check when wondering "Will this shit get me in trouble?"

There is a knock upon the door and a swarthy gentleman is shown into the room.  From his look and dress you would judge him a Seaman by trade.

"Ah need sum killin' done.  Don't worry, tain't here.  It's down b'low in Forida."
« Last Edit: September 17, 2015, 04:04:28 AM by bhu »

Offline Solo

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #71 on: September 17, 2015, 01:15:54 PM »
Wellesley gasps. "That wretched hive of scum and villainy?"
"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down."

Offline bhu

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #72 on: September 17, 2015, 03:48:37 PM »
"So y'all have bin there b'fore?"

Offline Vladeshi

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #73 on: September 17, 2015, 04:05:43 PM »
"Only once. I got a nasty sunburn from it."
The following explanation has been removed due to time constraints, character limits on posts, and the DC 30 Spellcraft checks to understand large portions of it.

Offline ketaro

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #74 on: September 18, 2015, 12:57:59 AM »
"Oh god, please, yes, let's go kill things. I can't listen to more of this legal nonsense. It's hard enough remembering all the fine print involved in just existing as a demon."

Offline bhu

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #75 on: September 18, 2015, 02:01:55 AM »
"Please go over our standard contract sir, while you explain the details.

He blanches "AW FUCK! There's readin'?"

After grumbling a bit he continues:

"Okay I used ta privateer outta Amelia Island off the coast of Florida.  One day we come back to make land fall, and no one's around.   Big ass ship o' the line sinks mah ship too.   I wan't you guys to fly in, figger out where everyone is, and stomp some ass."

Anyone with Knowledge Geography or Arcane can make checks as can anyone with a Profession (Sailor or Pirate) to see if you know Amelia island..

Offline Vladeshi

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #76 on: September 18, 2015, 02:27:22 AM »
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The following explanation has been removed due to time constraints, character limits on posts, and the DC 30 Spellcraft checks to understand large portions of it.

Offline Solo

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #77 on: September 18, 2015, 02:59:53 AM »
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"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down."

Offline bhu

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #78 on: September 18, 2015, 07:39:32 PM »
vlad and solo

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Offline Stratovarius

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Re: New guys thread
« Reply #79 on: September 18, 2015, 07:45:18 PM »
Bloodaxe pats the snake demon on her shoulder, rather carefully avoiding any bites that might result. "Don't worry lass, I'll stab any lawyers. And I'll be seconding you in the killing of things. I don't know a bloody thing about this Florida place, but if it lets me do some killing and looting, I'm all for it. Although I have found that a little judicious taxation and subtle rent adjustment is actually more profitable in the long run. Funny, isn't that?"