Author Topic: New rules and guidelines needed?  (Read 16301 times)

Offline Raineh Daze

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Re: New rules and guidelines needed?
« Reply #60 on: July 12, 2013, 11:36:15 AM »
Actually, it is an excuse. Whether you're happy people aren't disgorging the details of their life to you so you know why is your problem; not theirs. Vanishing off the face of the Earth is rude, certainly, but not giving full details about something? Not so much.
You'll note the second response centers more on consideration than simply the common representation element of "I'm busy", already moved on. :p

Though yes it does mention "I'm busy" is not an excuse, and I also pointed out if you think otherwise the person you should talk to is your boss (or teacher). Actually, did a quick google search then a really fast skimmed read. Try reading this:

Eh, that page has told me absolutely nothing and doesn't convince me at all that saying that other things are taking up a lot of time is not a legitimate thing to say to not post. Especially not where DMing is concerned, though actually playing isn't always that quick, either. >_>

Hell. the page you linked tells me less than nothing other than people always assuming the worst of each other.

EDIT: On a sidenote, it's fairly obvious why asking a boss or teacher if 'I'm busy' is an acceptable excuse won't work, and is completely nonindicative. Unless you're trying to say that  a PbP should be considered equally as important as not making an even more time-consuming mess out of your life, I don't see what that point is meant to make. Maybe that you think updating PbP's is of vital importance despite the fact it's only a hobby?
« Last Edit: July 12, 2013, 11:38:41 AM by Raineh Daze »

Offline SorO_Lost

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Re: New rules and guidelines needed?
« Reply #61 on: July 12, 2013, 04:27:01 PM »
Because you are arguing an entirely different facet. You see "too busy" as Internet anonymity and you need that protection. Nor do I think you have dealt with the same situations since Osaka is decently updated. Then you wrap everything up with a pretty plastic coating by calling it "fun", "fun" should not require effort. These latter two are really just extended validations for your primary reason of course. Fun and hobbies always require time and effort unless your pastime is called "stop breathing".

When I brought up "too busy" I am calling out the fact all to often enough the person is using it as a euphemism. From what I linked:
Quote
Likewise, going on about how busy you are isn’t conversation and doesn’t lead anywhere — except making your conversation partner bored, or worse, peeved. People who act super busy send the same message, making time spent with them never feel quite whole. Interestingly, I find that most people who are legitimately occupied — with their work, or family, or art, or what-have-you — rarely play the “too busy” card, or go out of their way to make time for meaningful connection exactly because they’ve been busy.
...
I’m giving you an easy excuse. This is one of the easiest outs for stuff I don’t want to do. Alternatively, I’ve spent a lot of time being distracted or stuck, but this excuse allows me to feel okay with it.
...
I'm busy = I'm giving you an excuse.
Saying that you're busy is a handy way to outsource your responsibility to your irresponsibility. Since you're always distracted, you don't have to do anything for anybody.
Rather than posting "I'm busy" they need to say what is really going on. And I don't mean tell me about how your mom turned off your Internet or your herps is acting up, rather "I can't play right now", "won't be on much", "withdrawing from the game." etc. all hand wave away expectancies you've created without being ambiguous wither or not people should wait for you. Everyone in the game has already deciphered you're busy comment to mean you just don't want to play, but they are trapped within their own politeness and manners to continue acknowledging your existence because there is that one in a thousand chance there really is something tying up your time beyond poor time management.

Offline Raineh Daze

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Re: New rules and guidelines needed?
« Reply #62 on: July 12, 2013, 05:19:05 PM »
So you're caught up in assuming the worst of people. Got it.

Offline ShadowViper

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Re: New rules and guidelines needed?
« Reply #63 on: July 13, 2013, 05:51:52 AM »
On the flip side of that, if everyone followed your rule there would be many fewer PbPs running on this site.
Realistically, High Arcane & Xethinix are not running. You cannot count them and thus adapting a you must be active rule wouldn't change anything at all in those threads. In fact, if the rule was implemented SirP's would you like to help me DM thread would be in the main PbP area gathering more views and when the planning was settled for restarting the High Arcane game it would move out of the Retired area and into the Current area. No harm done.

But, the expectancy that people whom said they want to play actually will do so will promote players to recheck the thread often for their turn to come up. And when it does, the other players know they won't have to wait long to see your actions. This promotes game activity, general traffic for the site to keep the owners happy, and no one gets bored or forgets what their characters did on their last turn over four months ago.

The only "loss" is people who are not around, who are not posting, who are not contributing, are expected to mention as much or get called out on it. Can you deal with that? If you're bitching, then no you can't. Obviously. But honestly, Mr Asshole SorO wants to remind you about something: No one gives a shit about your excuse of being too busy. You are seriously underestimating and insulting everyone else you play with whom are just as busy if not busier yet still manage to find the time to post when you claim you're far far far more busy than they are and thus cannot post. Man up to the real reason and try posting something like "I don't have time but would love to play, is there a way I can squeeze in?" I'm sure people would be willing to work with you on it.

QFE! Extremely well said!  :D

So you're caught up in assuming the worst of people. Got it.

So you're caught up in assuming what other people are assuming. Got it.

Oh look, I can play the trolling game too.  :rolleyes
« Last Edit: July 13, 2013, 05:59:47 AM by ShadowViper »
I hear it's amazing when the famous purple stuffed worm in flap-jaw space with the tuning fork does a raw blink on Hara-Kiri rock! I need scissors! 61!

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Offline veekie

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Re: New rules and guidelines needed?
« Reply #64 on: July 13, 2013, 06:15:58 AM »
Keep it civil guys. If you have nothing civil to say, don't say anything.
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Offline Raineh Daze

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Re: New rules and guidelines needed?
« Reply #65 on: July 13, 2013, 08:34:10 AM »
Fine, then.

Saying 'I'm busy' is an excuse. It does not tell you how much the person can do. It is sufficient reason, unless you're assuming the worst of someone, for any followup indicating why they might be posting less for a period. There is no reason to need more details; people are entitled to privacy. Not including some indication of what this can mean is stupid, because nobody else is a mind reader, but it is sufficient reason. I do not, however, know of many people that will interpret 'things are busy' to mean 'I don't like you and don't want to play with you'.

'I don't have time to' is the same thing, in different words. It makes no difference.

Also, you bring up Osaka, yet you're assuming that I haven't seen incredibly inactive threads. Well... this place moves faster than most things I've seen and taken part in. >_>;