Author Topic: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...  (Read 172600 times)

Offline bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #920 on: February 20, 2014, 03:12:02 AM »
With that the Clerics call a retreat and fall back, except for the Devils who continue their pointless assault on the Balor.  Its about this time a horseless carriage of some sort pulls up and the Sheriff and a few deputies get out.

He looks perturbed, and addresses the melee:

"Fiends aren't allowed in the city limits unless they've gotten a pass."

One of the Devils hisses something in Infernal, and the Sheriff puts his hand on the hilt of his axe "if I have to pull this, there will be trouble."

The Devils apparently decide discretion is better than valor, and flee posthaste.

Which leaves the Sheriff staring down the Balor.  "I don't suppose you're legal?"

Wordlessly the Balor turns and you all watch horrified as he re-enters the posterior cavity of a certain assassinette through much trial and tribulation.  She then mumbles "bye" and teleports out.

There is a long sigh from the Sheriff.  "Alright, whose up first for giving me an explanation."

Offline Sir Shadow

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #921 on: February 21, 2014, 05:08:29 AM »
"Aaaah, Sheriff, lovely night isn't it? We were just having a little soiree in honor of our grand opening as a Guild when, wouldn't you know it, those damned death cultists attacked us again." Bartholowmeow shrugs, with a slight grin, "It seems Natasha's ilk is quite dead-set on doing us in, pardon the pun."

Offline bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #922 on: February 21, 2014, 03:10:19 PM »
"And the young teleporting lass with the Balor?"

Offline Sir Shadow

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #923 on: February 25, 2014, 04:15:29 PM »
Bartholomeow does a quick look to their dryad secretary, "Was she on the list?"

And if so, "Well, you can't screen everyone, can you? Evilness knows, just getting everything prepared was a hassle, I can't go divining the entire guest list!

Offline bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #924 on: February 26, 2014, 12:51:43 AM »
"Your guess list seems composed of questionable people."

On cue as he says his a scaly man walks up "Is this the meeting for Assassins Guild?"

*looks startled*

"Hey...you're the Sheriff..."

The Sheriff's gaze returns to Bartholomeow

Offline RobbyPants

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #925 on: February 26, 2014, 09:38:43 AM »
Mustave short of shrugs and also looks at Bartholomeow, since he started talking.
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Offline RobbyPants

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #926 on: March 20, 2014, 10:39:42 AM »
After a long silence, Mustave offers up an explanation:

"We've had trouble with these stupid death cultists breaking down our doors more than once, and we wanted to consult some people who might be sufficiently... paranoid to help us beef up our security. We're not hiring out any hits, or anything like that. We just happened to have some spectacularly good and bad timing regarding our meeting and the death cultists breaking down the door at the exact same time."
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Offline bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #927 on: March 20, 2014, 04:15:16 PM »
"Uh huh." :grave

off to the side one of the assassinettes grabs the scaly man:

"Stavros!!!  So nice to see you! Come inside and have some wine and munchies.:

"Thanks I...is that a Medusa?  IS THIS A SETUP??? YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT MARRIAGE!! IT'S TANATAMOUNT TO SLAVERY!! I WILL ..."

"Grab 'im girls!"

He is led inside protesting all the way

the Sheriff looks at you  :grave

Offline RobbyPants

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #928 on: March 22, 2014, 11:34:56 AM »
"Well, shit. I didn't know anything about that."

(click to show/hide)
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Offline bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #929 on: March 22, 2014, 05:36:07 PM »
From inside:

"OMG he's a Maedar! How did you find a male of my species, they're so rare?"

"I AM NOT RETIRING TO BE A HOUSE HUSBAND!"

"Relax baby, I'm in the Evil Minion's Union, I'm not looking to get preggers and retire either.  I just wanted a significant other."

"ALL WOMEN ARE LIARS!! CAN'T TRUST 'EM! NOPE! NOPE!"

"Hey more than half the Assassin's Guild are women you butthead!"

"MY INSTINCTS OLD ME THIS PARTY WAS A TRAP WHEN IT WAS ANNOUNCED!"

the Sheriff: "You really should shut the front door..."

Offline RobbyPants

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #930 on: March 22, 2014, 09:25:22 PM »
Mustave facepalms and shuts the door.
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Offline bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #931 on: March 23, 2014, 04:32:55 PM »
"So you wanna tell me anything?"  :smirk

Offline RobbyPants

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #932 on: March 24, 2014, 01:01:52 PM »
"She's lonely and looking for a husband. We are trying to find interested guys who won't get killed in her presence.

Is that so bad? I think it's a rather noble pursuit."
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Offline bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #933 on: March 24, 2014, 04:50:40 PM »
"It is.  I'm kind of surprised to see a new Guild taking on such work, and am rather happy at the prospect.  Just a word of warning, be more forthcoming in the future."  ;)

"Plus, I'd keep relations open with the Assassin's Guild if I were you.  Technically I'm supposed to be on the opposite side of them, and I will arrest them if I catch them in the act, but an alliance with them makes it less likely a certain Church will hire them to off  you."


Eventually the Maedar (which you learn is a male medusa) and his newfound paramour agree to cohabit on a  trial basis, the Guild is paid, and a decent time is had by all after the massive cleanup effort. 

Please see the top post of the Character Sheet thread for the xp boost.

What's everyone's immediate goal on the new day?

Offline RobbyPants

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #934 on: March 25, 2014, 07:08:36 AM »
"It is.  I'm kind of surprised to see a new Guild taking on such work, and am rather happy at the prospect.  Just a word of warning, be more forthcoming in the future."  ;)

"Sorry. I kinda forgot about the medusa once the clerics came. I was busy talking to the assassins the whole time."


"Plus, I'd keep relations open with the Assassin's Guild if I were you.  Technically I'm supposed to be on the opposite side of them, and I will arrest them if I catch them in the act, but an alliance with them makes it less likely a certain Church will hire them to off  you."

"Yeah, that was sort of our thought. Most of them are actually pretty nice, albeit a bit odd."


What's everyone's immediate goal on the new day?

Mustave will first look for 'Stasia to make sure she's doing okay. Other than that, he'll focus on the clean up. He doesn't have any pressing issues in the mean time until me makes some money. He's interested in possibly getting one of those few fangled guns.
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Offline bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #935 on: March 26, 2014, 08:08:09 PM »
Venn and Jojo?

Offline jojolagger

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #936 on: March 28, 2014, 10:32:42 AM »
The spider lacks objectives. He'd probably ride shotgun if someone were looking to head out, otherwise he'd just sit about spinning some webs in the guildhall, near the front door.
Out of net access for a bit. Should be back late monday.

Offline bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #937 on: March 28, 2014, 04:18:21 PM »
sir shadow and radmelon?

Offline radmelon

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #938 on: March 28, 2014, 10:04:01 PM »
Meditate on the nature of chaos. Which is to say, get drunk and perhaps commit practical jokes.

Offline bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread VI: Hippos are cute until you realize they poop...
« Reply #939 on: March 31, 2014, 09:29:24 PM »
You are all informed as you stagger down for the morning that Cusic and her pet hippo have switched Guilds to Joe (of Joe's used pets).  She feels her love of aminals will serve them better than it would you. 

Bigsley decided he didn't want to be part of a massive feud and hustled out.

In addition Zachary has moved on with the Sackbiter family for unknown purposes.  So the Guild needs a new leader. 

Once that is settled your lovely assistant has some assignments for you to peruse.
« Last Edit: March 31, 2014, 09:31:56 PM by bhu »