The big tin man pipes up, "*Ahem* Madam, perhaps you were not present within the nearby city blocks when I shouted about this not being a brothel any longer. This is the residence of a new Adventurer's Guild, which I am fairly certain is currently a house full of only literal dirt, and not metaphorical filth. Perhaps we can sit down to some biscuits and tea and discuss what your emergent problem is? If not, I will gladly boot you to the next block, if it please you."
Though not yet a member of the guild, Bigsley was eager to prove himself useful. He had even managed to remember where he was and what he was doing! This was a good omen, he thought, despite the fact that some very strange things had been going on lately.
Orc: "I make people choke on their own teeth."@ Orc: "Interesting... Are you some sort of toothomancer?"
Elf: "I fuck violent older women. I'm also pretty good at seducing guards regardless of race/gender. I've even screwed a hungry Mindflayer and kept my brain."
I'm going to have a look at these spiders I think. Are they really that poisonous? Bill asks of the squirrel.
Quote from: bhu in old threadOrc: "I make people choke on their own teeth."@ Orc: "Interesting... Are you some sort of toothomancer?"
Elf: "I fuck violent older women. I'm also pretty good at seducing guards regardless of race/gender. I've even screwed a hungry Mindflayer and kept my brain."
@ Elf: "How about medusea? I know one who might be interested."
Kintal looks at the woman that stormed in and bursts out laughing.
Quote from: bhu in old threadOrc: "I make people choke on their own teeth."@ Orc: "Interesting... Are you some sort of toothomancer?"
Elf: "I fuck violent older women. I'm also pretty good at seducing guards regardless of race/gender. I've even screwed a hungry Mindflayer and kept my brain."
@ Elf: "How about medusea? I know one who might be interested."
They left already but we'll assume you snuck that in before they did so:
"Sure, but I have mami now. We're kind of a thing." More elf/orc smooching.
Joseph trots down into the room with all the yelling "Who's she and what does she want?" joseph says eyeing the head priest lady"She's a High Priestess of Grizelda, whatever that is, and she seems to want to piss off the big metal guy.
Joseph trots down into the room with all the yelling "Who's she and what does she want?" joseph says eyeing the head priest lady"She's a High Priestess of Grizelda, whatever that is, and she seems to want to piss off the big metal guy.
I'm not one to pick sides, but 10 gold says the metal guy could kick her right out the door in one shot!"
Mustave smiles, hoping beyond all hope that he sees that happen.
"Do I look stupid, I will never bet anything with you"Mostly to himself "Heh. Smart lad."
The Priestess is about to say something when she notices Cusic with alarm
"DANCING IS EVIL AND LEADS TO FORNICATION!! FORNICATION LEADS TO DEATH AND SUFFERING!! CEASE NOW OR RISK A TERRIFYING PUNISHMENT IN THE BOWELS OF HELL!"
Her magically enhanced voice reverberates through the house as a spider the size of an orange falls from the ceiling onto her bosom. She reaches up and casually crushes it like a grape.
"Also, you people really need to do something about your spider problem..."
"DANCING IS EVIL AND LEADS TO FORNICATION!! FORNICATION LEADS TO DEATH AND SUFFERING!! CEASE NOW OR RISK A TERRIFYING PUNISHMENT IN THE BOWELS OF HELL!""Wait. I thought those first two things were good things."
Bill, shall we? Or should we make sure nothing horrible is happening downstairs first?"[/color]
Coming down the stairs more than expecting to kill something, Zach asks none too politely "What the hell is going on down here?""Some dwarves want to spray me and we have spiders and there's an angry lady who's shouting."
"I know about the spiders, I was going to kill them.""Do you need some help?"
"Not nessarily a want, we jest gets lots a' rekwests ter do it. You got the standard hidden passages or is this an easy job?""Wait. Requests to spray halflings or to spray me?"
"I know about the spiders, I was going to kill them.""Do you need some help?""Not nessarily a want, we jest gets lots a' rekwests ter do it. You got the standard hidden passages or is this an easy job?""Wait. Requests to spray halflings or to spray me?"
"Well, I wouldn't mind having that task taken off my hands. I had a little aggressive investigating to do, after all. How long should it take?" He remembers to check downstairs for Bartholomeow; he'd wanted to come with him on their little zombie-excursion.
"Halflin's in general. Some'a the rich snotty bastards on the other side of town consider us short people to be vermin too."Oh, that's understandable. I just wanted to make sure someone wasn't trying to off me or something."
Also it's really better to spray fer the spiders sir, since it ain't likely you'll squish em all by hand first. Plus the city pays us, so it's free fer you.""Oh, sweet. I can't turn down free. Let me know if you need any help... and don't spray me!"
"Also a place this size prolly has hundreds of em."
this oplace really doesnt need the modify and quote buttons so close
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"Wh- spiders? What are you on about, boy?""I only saw one earlier. It fell in some woman's cleavage or something, and I got sorta distracted after that. I guess Zach says there are a bunch of them or something. Anyway, these dwarves here in the kink-fetish armor are here to kill them. I figured I'd just stick around and make sure none escape. You look like you'd be real good at bug squishin!"
"I can only assume my faculties at stomping bugs have largely improved with this body. My name is Sir Richard Bigsley the Third, and I suppose it goes without saying, but I used to be a highly... well, a respected... Well, I was a wizard. My life experiences haven't lent well toward physical activity, but I suspect there's not so much to it.""You're a metal wizard? Awesome!"
!0 minutes later the dwarves flee the building,How far away are they? I assume Mustave stood back at a safe distance. He currently has two daggers drawn in anticipation of danger.
Behind them are 4 million pounds of enraged dying spiders.
What do you wish to do :D
You have about 6 rounds before the spiders reach you unless they fall to the poison firstIn that case, Mustave first puts his daggers away, then casts Expeditious Retreat. The next round he casts Spider Climb.
Bigsley mutters, "Was... was a wizard...""Oh my gods. I'm so sorry. I had no idea. It's okay, big guy. You're still big... and metal.
He looks toward the ensuing spider swarm and says, "What I wouldn't give to be able to cast a nice fireball right now! I suppose improvisation will have to do." He appears ready to simply fall on top of a good volume of them.
(click to show/hide)
The current area is 5x10 robby, but that appears to be expanding.I think I still have four rounds after the casting. Mustave can't do a lot to stop this many spiders. An illusionary wall would probably fail as they'd try to climb it and would go right through.
one even swears about revenge."Great. Zombie spiders next week. Or ghost spiders. Which are worse? Can ghost spiders poison you?"
one even swears about revenge."Great. Zombie spiders next week. Or ghost spiders. Which are worse? Can ghost spiders poison you?"
Mustave ponders these things as he casts Spider Climb and climbs up the nearest building. If it's 20 or less feet tall, he stops on the roof and watches the spiders progress, getting ready to attack or run as the situation warrants.
"Critter smashin time!"
Teo looks for the largest, flattest rock he can find and throws it into the swarm.
You look to your left and see a translucent naked halfling chick floating in the air next to you. She says "yup"."Waoh! Are you my guardian angel, or just a hawt ghost!?"
You look to your left and see a translucent naked halfling chick floating in the air next to you. She says "yup"."Waoh! Are you my guardian angel, or just a hawt ghost!?"
Mustave tries really hard to stay focused on the spiders.
As none of the spiders have come close to him, Kintal deigns to pay attention to them and looks bored.
"Guardian Angels dont get burned at teh stake for being able to sing "Nearer Mah Gawd to Thee" from their butthole.""That's awesome! I'm a joker myself, and I've never perfected anal singing! What's your secret?
"Guardian Angels dont get burned at teh stake for being able to sing "Nearer Mah Gawd to Thee" from their butthole.""That's awesome! I'm a joker myself, and I've never perfected anal singing! What's your secret?
Oh, if the spiders that vowed revenge come back as ghosts, can you give me a warning, or something?"
Mustave remembers to glance back at the spiders (which are probably still 3 rounds away, assuming nothing's changed).
the spiders are now in a 10'x15' areaHow far are they from me? I can close 40 feet if needed (and if there's roof space) and throw an acid flask trying to avoid any friendlies. It will hit one square and then do 1 spash damage to all adjacent areas.
"OMG WHO LEFT HIS POOR KITTY IN THE PATH OF THESE SPIDERS?"I'm assuming this is Bill. He will shield his face and bill but remain still unless the woman starts to damage him.
Did any actually die? If so, just the spider attacked, or did any die from the splash damage?
you am successfuls RObby :)
a few crumble from the combo of poison and acidWhen my next round comes up, I'll throw another flask:
there is a loud hissing sound as they begin moving your way
"Alright then, manholes it is. However, first...." Zach stops for a minute, shifts in his clothing slightly, then says strongly and officially, "I request your presence now, Fred Sackbiter! Sackbiters, assemble!"(click to show/hide)
"New enough, though we seem to be able to accomplish enough on our own. We're hunting down a rogue zombie that was previously in the employ of agents of the Wizards guild, before we accidentally destroyed them. Now he has some delusions about picking up where his masters left off, and we've been told he's inherited enough magic to be a threat. Supposedly, he makes camp somewhere down there. Would your maps happen to include such information?"
If the spider problem looks mostly taken care of, Mustave will climb on down, and thank the halfling ghost for her time (assuming she's still there):(click to show/hide)
If not, he'll stay on the roof and throw another flask of acid, assuming the spiders are still advancing:(click to show/hide)
the ghost is hovering next to you"Awesome. My name is Mustave, by the way.
"A lotta the bars don't 'llow ghosties. I could invite you ta tha Ghost Bar but some of them might find you snackable. Boobs knows where I live you can always get in touch with me via her."
"Yah ev'ryone calls her Boobs. Cause of her Boobs. My stage name is Analstasia but you can call me Bert.""Heh. Analstasia. Thanks Bert, and take care."
Deciding that this city must be a land of succulent breasts and wondering if he needs to spend more time in humanoid form to take advantage of said breasts Kintal says, "Well aren't you a pretty dead lady!" He walks over to her and purrs, ignoring the spiders. This is much more interesting.
Apparently all of you go before the spiders so give em your allSorry. I didn't roll Initiative yet, as I was on the roof.
Kintal purrs. "I'm a magical talking demon kitty to be more specific."
"So mister Deputy are you gonna help us find this group of zombies?" Joseph says eagerly
Kintal looks confused. "Your name is Bert?"
rad(click to show/hide)
Bill puts his chin in his palm and nods at Bert Most impressive, I must say.
Kintal wipes spider goo off of his face. "I need a bath before eating..."
team zombeh(click to show/hide)
team zombeh(click to show/hide)
Kintal hisses loudly, his hackles raised as lightning arcs between his teeth. He does not approve.
"We'll have yer place ready in an hour er so. You had dinner?""Not yet, but I don't want spiders if that's what you're talking about."
"We'll have yer place ready in an hour er so. You had dinner?""Not yet, but I don't want spiders if that's what you're talking about."
Kintal tries to lick the water off. "I'm not clockwork, I'm a cat. Don't you know that cats hate water?"
team zombeh(click to show/hide)(click to show/hide)
Kintal tries to lick the water off. "I'm not clockwork, I'm a cat. Don't you know that cats hate water?"
"Ummm...well no. We always take our cat to the pool when we visit or she gets pissed at us. And if'n yer not clockwork whats with the 'lectricity?"
"Naw mah cousin has a pub a few streets down if'n yer hungry. He'd always appreciate meeting new business owners in the area.""I like trying new places. Do they accept friendly ghosts?"
"Oh well. I was hoping to hear a lovely song...""Oh you will. By sweetie. Bye lil kitty!"
Mustave turns to the rest of the group by the spiders:
"Anyone else wanna go?"
zombeh(click to show/hide)
(click to show/hide)
Just water for drinks, but have you got any meat? I feel like eating something
I think I'll go for the mutton.
@ Zombie Crew:(click to show/hide)
"I'm not hungry. Nor am I thirsty.... I haven't been for some time, now that I think about it...""Probably a good thing. I don't know how you'd go to the bathroom."
"Meat is good!"
She looks at you "So how big is your Guild? You got anything lined up?""I'm not sure. I was too busy paying attention to naked orcs and elves and killing spiders."
"No, no, you must be Jorvar! You're the spitting image! Why, Jorvar, what have you been doing with yourself these days?"
Bigsley clearly isn't paying attention to the excitement awakening in the bar.
Your dagger is promptly returned, while a young dwarf matron scolds you about throwing pointy things in the restaurant."That's the last time I do any good deeds."
Your dagger is promptly returned, while a young dwarf matron scolds you about throwing pointy things in the restaurant."That's the last time I do any good deeds."
Mustave returns to his ale and mutton, still keeping an eye on the sociopath.
Zach will politely excuse himself to find the others, asking that Bob meet them by the new guildhouse whenever he's free. He runs back to the guildhouse, hoping that someone will still be there. He finds himself inexplicably angry. "Eleven...." he mutters, under his breath.
"No, you can do good deeds, but there's kids here. Think of what would happen if you missed.""I never miss. ;) But okay. I won't throw pointy things or acid in here anymore."
"Well, everything looks to be in order.Zach will politely excuse himself to find the others, asking that Bob meet them by the new guildhouse whenever he's free. He runs back to the guildhouse, hoping that someone will still be there. He finds himself inexplicably angry. "Eleven...." he mutters, under his breath.
Your new digs are leaking poison fog and surrounded by dwarves in the feudal equivalent of hazmat suits.
Theyre sweeping up about 4 tons of dead spiders
"WHEN WERE YOU THROWING ACID?""Whaaa? Who said anything about acid? I said 'and such'. Pointy things and such."
"Well, everything looks to be in order.Zach will politely excuse himself to find the others, asking that Bob meet them by the new guildhouse whenever he's free. He runs back to the guildhouse, hoping that someone will still be there. He finds himself inexplicably angry. "Eleven...." he mutters, under his breath.
Your new digs are leaking poison fog and surrounded by dwarves in the feudal equivalent of hazmat suits.
Theyre sweeping up about 4 tons of dead spiders
Excuse me!" He tries to hail one of the hazmat dwarves shoveling corpses without approaching the domicile too closely. "Any idea where the other guildsmen living here went before..... well alright, probably after you killed the spiders?"
"WHEN WERE YOU THROWING ACID?""Whaaa? Who said anything about acid? I said 'and such'. Pointy things and such."
Bluff = d20 + 11
(http://www.minmaxboards.com/Themes/Thing/images/dice_warn.gif) This dice roll has been tampered with!
Rolled 1d20+11 : 5 + 11, total 16
"Well don't throw no and such neither. Here's yer special hot dwarf ale. On da house if you give us a good review." :D"This is amazing! It tastes like boiled leather and fire! What's your secret?
It tastes like boiled leather and fire. Your guess it's 50% alcohol at least. And yet it somehow seems to taste better warm, or at least you assume since you haven't had it cold.
"Yeah we recommended a local restaurant they could hang out at. "Zach twitches, cursing out "exterminate..." before smiling and thanking the dwarves, complimenting their efforts, and dashing off to the restaurant.
They give you the address as a coughing spider rears up and vows revenge in a squeaky voice before expiring. Revenge for his 11 siblings. Damn spiders...
"Follower? I'm afraid I don't understand... as opposed to a leader?..."
"Careful Bob. You might want to wait this one out. We're professionals. In this land, ghosts fuck you."
"If we all move quickly and with focus, we shouldn't be too much of an issue to the deputies. Boobs, are we leaving you behind to watch the House? Is everyone ready otherwise?" Zach tightened the straps on his clothing and the chords on his sandals. He wasn't sure how useful he was actually going to wind up being, but he planned on removing any threat non-wraith in origin. The group could focus on the horrors; he could at least make sure they weren't distracted.
Sure I can supervise clean up and take care of any legal problems that pop up from the relatives. Does this mean I'm officially an intern? :DOf course. You're already our, what were my exact words... Legal Representative.
"Is everyone ready otherwise?""I'm good to go."
Let's vanquish those wraiths Bill says in a voice that is more passionate than you are used to hear"Is everyone ready otherwise?""I'm good to go."
(click to show/hide)
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"Does anyone have a non-flammable light? I have experience with these types of gases and fire. This isn't one of the times you want to mix them."The platypus speaks up I have one spell prepared for that purpose. It should emulate a torch for approximately a hour
"I hope emulate means not burning the hair and skin off my body.""Does anyone have a non-flammable light? I have experience with these types of gases and fire. This isn't one of the times you want to mix them."The platypus speaks up I have one spell prepared for that purpose. It should emulate a torch for approximately a hour
Once everyone else has made their way down the hole, Bigsley announces, "Please do make way! I would hate to accidentally crush any of you to death!"Mustave promptly gets out of the way.
"What? It's like a fat, hairless dog!"
Does it seem hostile? What's it doing?
(http://www.minmaxboards.com/Themes/Thing/images/dice_warn.gif) This dice roll has been tampered with!
Rolled 1d20+6 : 4 + 6, total 10
Also: Bill used his spell on whatever object Mustave preferred.
Bill suddenly speeds up and rushes to the source of the sound. Should/When he bump/s into someone, he will quickly mumble S'cuse me without loosing focus on his target destination.
Does anyone have anything edible with them?(click to show/hide)
Does anyone have anything edible with them?"No. Sorry. I could get some mutton from the place we were just at. Dogs like meat, right?"
Bigsley rubs his metal chin for a moment in contemplation.(click to show/hide)
Cusic is rather happy it has chosen her for shelter despite the imminent threat of huggles. At the moment she is content with poking its squidgy form.
Biglsey's chest speaks up. "Yeah, we're gonna kill em!"
Zach straightens up, but keeps one hand on his hilt anyway. "More specifically, we're looking for a crazy zombie, very good at unarmed fighting. You wouldn't happen to know how far we are from it, would you?"
Also uh...I think this lil critters dead mama back dat way too...""When you say 'dead', do you mean dead or not alive? You're not talking about some type of fat zombie dog or ghost, are you?"
Bill chuckles slightly.
Heh. EMU. Hey, Bill. You get it, right?"
Also uh...I think this lil critters dead mama back dat way too...""When you say 'dead', do you mean dead or not alive? You're not talking about some type of fat zombie dog or ghost, are you?"
"So, how might we go about getting a pass?"
"Wait...medusa...Summabitch Gawdamn is Clarice man huntin' again?"Mustave's eyebrows raise sharply. "Why? You interested?"
"Whut kinder food pig dawgs eat? You might wanna take that to old joe topside, He could prolly tell you."My experiences tell me this little fella probably eats plants. Although I'm not quite sure what kind of plant he feeds on. Bill hunches next to the creature and gives it another inspection. His fascination is obvious
"Whut kinder food pig dawgs eat? You might wanna take that to old joe topside, He could prolly tell you."My experiences tell me this little fella probably eats plants. Although I'm not quite sure what kind of plant he feeds on. Bill hunches next to the creature and gives it another inspection. His fascination is obvious
"Wait...medusa...Summabitch Gawdamn is Clarice man huntin' again?"Mustave's eyebrows raise sharply. "Why? You interested?"
You know any ghost wimmens? Hard to meet good monstah wimmens round here."Mustave opens his mouth and then closes it again for a second. "...No."
"We do happen to know a few ghost women. Regardless, is thta pass good for only one, or is it good for the group, since we were hired as a group to find her a husband.
Tell me, are zombies in danger of being poisoned?" A smirk appears... kind of like when he smiles right before going samurai-apeshit-murder on something. You get the impression he has a plan.
"Whuh? no." poke poke. "its so squidgy!"
Bartholomeow follows its familiar, "What is it, Truffles?"
Well, then I'm going to say this without complicating it. I'm quite sure he's decided that you've adopted him. And it also seems that he thinks it's time to eat. You're a mother, congratulations. There is not a single trace of sarcasm in Bill's voice, his regards seems to be most sincere."Whuh? no." poke poke. "its so squidgy!"
It bleats again. Obviously it is quite hungry.
SPot checks from group to notice Truffles leading Bartholomeow down a side passage by himself.
Cusic being faster than most and completely fearless runs towards the mass, it was dark but she could see well enough and could hopefully make out what it is.(click to show/hide)
"Oh, splendid. They talk.
You wouldn't mind telling us how your current meal was killed, would you?" Zach looks around the cavern, as far as his light will shine and let him see. He checks above as well as to the sides, knowing better than to trust his sensibilities of things not being above him. "Bob, any idea where we are?"
Bartholomeow isn't amused by the maggots. Can he tell what kind of creature it was before it died?
Bill seems obviously confused by the maggots; the sadism in the voice of the talking one is obviously grinding his gears, but for this world it might just be another case of a predator catching a prey. He heeds Ceus warning however, and keeps his guard up.(click to show/hide)
Edit: Major typo
Bob: "So uh....what are we doing with the animal? We taking it with us to ghost city?"I really don't think that's a good idea. But it's up to Mummy. Bill turns to Cusic; you could swear that he would have smiled slightly, had he had lips.
Cusic hurredly picks it up. "MINE!"
Bartholomeow looks through the scroll case to see what he just inherited from his fellow necromancer. Perhaps ones the maggots were done, he'd use the bones for... something else.
Cusic hurredly picks it up. "MINE!"
what uh...what is your strength score?
lols
Cusic hurredly picks it up. "MINE!"
what uh...what is your strength score?
lols
... 13, apparently can lift 300lbs off the ground
(( I think she's picking up the baby hippo, not the body or scroll case. ))
1d20=6 (http://invisiblecastle.com/roller/view/3340172/)
:bigeyesBill stands on the top of his toes and pats Cusic's arm slightly. He'll be out of harms way and you could get him that food we were talking about earlier. Babies need a lot of food and rest-
"I bet I could still blind them, but I'm thinking I might not have to..."
Bhu: do they appear solid or incorporeal?
"These guys don't seem too bad. Maybe they got a bad rap."
"They're just standing guard. This makes sense; the most professional and deadly samurai I knew would act the same.
Let's just take out our pass and progress peacefully. Though keep that idea in your pocket, Mustave."
(click to show/hide)
"Not really."(click to show/hide)
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"What? Is he too young? This is not exactly a brothel... or is it? I should have known that 'Wight City' would be some sort of euphemism. Feh, the youth these days! Why, in my day..." Bigsley is lost in his rant, unable to fully perceive the creatures' intentions.
The corner of Bartholomeow's mouth twitches, "Well do you have a supervisory manager or something?"
Bill tilts his head and observes(click to show/hide)
"The owner was dead and being devoured by sentient maggots. They offered up the scroll case as it is inedible." Bartholomeow gives the exalted wraith a look, one of mixed interest and slightly reserved annoyance. "Your lordship, accursed or not, I have no interest in your city. Would it be possible to just chat a moment with you? There are... extenuating circumstances involving my presence here..."
"As you are in charge of this city, I do not believe you would be dishonest. Your guards have already stated that unless there was already an iota of good will between you and the Guild, I would already be dead, and if you wanted to kill me, I'm fairly certain you could. So, in short, I suppose, yes, I trust you to teleportly safely to the other side if you give me your word I won't be harmed."
"Just in case you mortals got any funny ideas my asshole is a portal to Hell. Don't fuck with me."Mustave opens his mouth, and in a rare display of self control, shuts it.
Kintal looks intruiged. "Is there an Evil Bosses Union?"
Kintal scowls.
Kintal shrugs. "He's doing well enough to bond my soul with a demon."
"Or at least not directly interfering.""What's the difference?"
"So, how do we propose satisfying our client in a way which doesn't involve heavy drinking and losing a bet?""Wait. Why are we ruling that out? That seems like the easiest way.
"Wait... just wait a second... I think you might have something! What if we were to, say, create a construct for the exact purpose of her pleasure? Surely there must be an crafter or artificer in this city up to the job. I've seen far stranger things since my coming here."I think it would take to long to be an effective stop gap, and she does want kids, which rules out the construct route. That said, if memory serves, a fellow trailblazer had a magic blindfold that allowed him to see without sight. I'm sure it could be replicated, which would act as a bypass for the immune to petrification.
"If that's so, then we just need someone that doesn't mind scales."Given where we are, I think that has been the least of our problems all along
"The fuck did you call me?"Suidaean is a highly academic term for your race, and others similar to it. There is no reason to take offense.
"The fuck does academic mean?" (he doesn't seem hostile, just vulgar)"Book-lernnen talk. He's read lots of em."
"I don't see any demons about. I do however see a small menagerie. Are any of you Familiars and if so do you belong to the Familiars Union? We can't have scabs running about."No to both questions. Lord Zandak might qualify for the first, but I'd doubt he'd be interested.
*ignores kintal in a huffy manner* "And which of you might be Lord Zantak?"He's not here right now. I have a mental link to him, and he's sitting up in the sheriff's office in case we need help down here. If you really want I can pass along a message, thought I doubt he'll be too happy to listen with you mispronouncing his name and all that.
*ignores kintal in a huffy manner* "And which of you might be Lord Zantak?"He's not here right now. I have a mental link to him, and he's sitting up in the sheriff's office in case we need help down here. If you really want I can pass along a message, thought I doubt he'll be too happy to listen with you mispronouncing his name and all that.
"Mr. Truffles does not need to be molested by a group of goblins. Especially not ones that shout 'kawai'." If Bartholomeow had teleport, he'd be using it. Now.
Kintal is glad that for once he is being ignored.
Ceus can barely resist laughing at the last remark, knowing Zach's traditional nature.Bill decides its not worth trying and laughs openly at the newcomers attempts at giving his comrades their affection
Ceus can barely resist laughing at the last remark, knowing Zach's traditional nature.Bill decides its not worth trying and laughs openly at the newcomers attempts at giving his comrades their affection
Bill (who kinda saw this coming) looks down at his short legs as Teo asks him to run and then shrugs his shoulders.Ceus can barely resist laughing at the last remark, knowing Zach's traditional nature.Bill decides its not worth trying and laughs openly at the newcomers attempts at giving his comrades their affection
"OMG what are u?"
"Can we touch your fur?"
"SNUGGLE THE INTERLOPER!"
To Bill: "Why for you have stickers?"*shrugs*We're born with them. We mostly use them to deliver our venom
"I'm not interested in mating. Especially not outside my species."
"I have some interesting scarring, but I don't think that's what you meant. Tell me, would you happen to know of any men immune to poison? Or know if poison is a popular pastime?"
"Nothing, actually; we're looking for a man who wont die from poison and whom might be interested in snakes." After the babies offer, Zach will take whatever misunderstanding he can to get out of here quicker.
"I think he wants da Assassin's Guild Mawm. Sides I don't want him anyway I like this one." *gloms Bill*
"Madam, if you are seeking compensation, perhaps you could give us an example of what you might be expecting?" Bigsley asks.
Bill's hugger slips him a card "If you change your mind in the future give us a visit."Thank you. I'll keep that in mind.
" I guess I will take one for the team this is gonna end terribly isn`t it" Joseph says"Depends on tastes and experiences, I suppose..."
Kintal peeks out, confused. "But he doesn't have a pe....nevermind."
"I want to remember as little of this place as possible."I don't know about that. So far, this has been an interesting experience and I've learned a lot of new things.
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Ceusharath will go as responsible supervision.(click to show/hide)
http://lh5.ggpht.com/vapettingzoo/Ro0QG274EsI/AAAAAAAAABc/JLToHOqLa9I/s288/sikly+chicken.jpg*points* One of those, please
http://lh5.ggpht.com/vapettingzoo/Ro0QG274EsI/AAAAAAAAABc/JLToHOqLa9I/s288/sikly+chicken.jpg*points* One of those, please
Bill is a druid, he started seeing past the "cute and fluffy" a long time ago, so of course this is just him picking one at random :Dhttp://lh5.ggpht.com/vapettingzoo/Ro0QG274EsI/AAAAAAAAABc/JLToHOqLa9I/s288/sikly+chicken.jpg*points* One of those, please
you realize the likelihood of being able to kill one of those with CUsic knowing about it right?
"A man in a chicken suit you say? What did he want?"
Cusic contemplates the hippo a moment. "I don't think its going to be good at guarding stuffs.... But is SOOO squishy" she then proceeds to poke it and hug it.
"Lots of paperwork, officially introducing yourself to the movers and shakers of the city, meeting potential benefactors and enemies. You know, schmoozing.""I'm so glad you're here. I don't have the patience for that sorta stuff."
"Also by law you have to declare yourselves open at some point and invite people in to make pitches for your business, and for potential hiring."
"Speaking of which y'all are gonna need some bidness."
"Is there anything that I can do to help? I am still attempting to prove myself worthy of joining the guild.""Dood. You're made of iron, the size of a small house, and have a cage inside of you. What's left to prove? You're good in my book."
I guess that depends on your definition of foolish.
I wouldn't mind some food as well
"My definition would be going out naked with a dead chicken to summon the Assassins Guild."Of course we're going to do something foolish. But bigsley can't be stabbed effectively, I can't be snuck up on.
And I don't mind being naked. Bill adds in a satisfied voice"My definition would be going out naked with a dead chicken to summon the Assassins Guild."Of course we're going to do something foolish. But bigsley can't be stabbed effectively, I can't be snuck up on.
And I don't mind being naked. Bill adds in a satisfied voice"My definition would be going out naked with a dead chicken to summon the Assassins Guild."Of course we're going to do something foolish. But bigsley can't be stabbed effectively, I can't be snuck up on.
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"'l'll take on the chicken guy. Anything I should prepare for in particular? I didn't actually get to see him. Probably a good thing."
"Aaaah one of you is a psychic. Is there somewhere more private we can talk?"Why the need? I am quite adept at telepathy, and can assure the communication is secure. However if you insist, our guildhall is reasonably secure.
The catgirls escort RUam and a befuddled chicken into the Guildhall.Neither actually, you might say I'm looking for information. At a later point it may or may not get someone laid. It's actually quite a long story and I'm not sure I understand all of the details myself.
"Much better here, less crowded. So were you looking to get laid or have someone killed?"
"If you weren't looking to get laid why did you go outside naked with a chicken?"As you guessed at first, me and my friends are trying to get a hold of the Assassins. But our purpose for doing so is not to have someone killed. We are in fact looking for them so that no one will die at a certain encounter.
"If you weren't looking to get laid why did you go outside naked with a chicken?"As you guessed at first, me and my friends are trying to get a hold of the Assassins. But our purpose for doing so is not to have someone killed. We are in fact looking for them so that no one will die at a certain encounter.
"asdfasdfasdf... Fine. Lets get this over with."
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Is she a lesbian? Most members of the Assassin's Guild are women. It's part of the reason the chicken ritual came about.""Why? Do they sleep with guys before they kill them?
"She seems to be specific about wanting a man. Though if you knew of a way to make someone immune to snake bites...."
Is she a lesbian? Most members of the Assassin's Guild are women. It's part of the reason the chicken ritual came about.""Why? Do they sleep with guys before they kill them?
If so, I think I like this place a little bit less. So far, my best romantic prospect is incorporeal. Although, she is cool as hell."
"Ahem, so if we can hook up your medusa pal whats in it for us?"
Kintal flirts back just as openly (or subtly depending on perspective). He wonders whether or not he'll have to pay for anything as he lets slip that he can take humanoid form.
"Ahem, so if we can hook up your medusa pal whats in it for us?"I'd assume we could compensate you in a variety of ways. Cash, gear, less subtle muscle for more difficult contracts, ect. What are you most interested in getting in return?
"Ahem, so if we can hook up your medusa pal whats in it for us?"I'd assume we could compensate you in a variety of ways. Cash, gear, less subtle muscle for more difficult contracts, ect. What are you most interested in getting in return?
"We know you're starting out. You don't have the cash or gear yet, and your muscle isn't subtle (looks at Bigsley). However...you have shown an open mind so we have a proposal. We want laid. And not just once in a while by some chicken waving lunatic in whats likely to be an ambush. There's no dating service here for 'monsters' or other socially unacceptable people. And we've got no help setting up solutions to the problems that plague our love lives like getting messages delivered to loves ones, or preventing murder on our dates. Our own colleagues are Evil so we can't exactly trust them. So we need some neutral intercessors. Someone who can let people know why we cant show for dinner. Someone who can provide security. Someone who's accepted for, say, saving the city and thought well of by most. Someone who was willing to buy the Velvet Fist despite it's terrifying past and reopen it despite the inevitable problems to follow."So messages, arrangements, and a no-violence zone? That should be well within our skills. Hell, a mind-reader can easily keep an eye on others. However, The Velvet Fish?
"Fist. Velvet Fist. The building were sitting in. No one told you it was one of the worlds most infamous brothels when u bought it?"We were told it was a brothel sometime after it was mentioned, and there were some questions from the repair guys about ghosts. That's all we know.
For the first time in a long time Kintal turns into his Tibbit form. His catness is still very evident, though luckily for everyone he is fully clothed.(click to show/hide)
Kintal leads her off to a more private part of the building. "I would love to."
I am both disappointed and relieved.Kintal leads her off to a more private part of the building. "I would love to."I won't be roleplaying the 'ahem' act
Cat sex is horribly rough...Typically only for the female. ))
In that case make it 2d4 damage and gain 1 xp lol
"No not her. The High Priestess of Grizelda."Oh, so if any ghost do show up they're likely to help us keep her out? Wonderful. Well, it sound reopening the Velvet Fist is a good business move and get's us what we need. I'd like a bit of guidance setting it up, as it isn't my area of expertise, but Once we get the hang of it, it'll be fine.
"No not her. The High Priestess of Grizelda."Oh, so if any ghost do show up they're likely to help us keep her out? Wonderful. Well, it sound reopening the Velvet Fist is a good business move and get's us what we need. I'd like a bit of guidance setting it up, as it isn't my area of expertise, but Once we get the hang of it, it'll be fine.
"Well...possibly...although ghosts usually move on after they get whatever they stayed behind to achieve done. Revenge should've been it."Wonderful. Having sat on the other side of the veil until recently, I believe it to be know the guild has a ghost among it's ranks. Which I can easily confirm. 'Yes, one of the guilds founders was postmortem. He still works here, but he doesn't talk much.'
"Plus rumor has it they occasionally get horny, and you'd have the Anti-Ghost and Ghost Rights Movements attracted to you."
"On the other hand, no one fucks with ghosts. That rep alone will keep people from busting in even if the rumors bout ghosts aren't true."
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http://invisiblecastle.com/roller/view/3487800/I use Mindsight and touchsight for detection purposes. If I'm ever withing 35 ft. of whatever it is that we're trying to detect, and it has an intelligence score, I auto-detect it, its location, its type, and its Int score. If I cast Touchsight, I get to see any solid objects within 50+ ft. for a few minutes.
Ceushareth sleeps like a stone.
http://invisiblecastle.com/roller/view/3487801/
As does Konner (man you guys are like logs)
Does this work while u are asleep?It should. Telepathy should work even while I sleep, and mindsight just piggybacks on telepathy.
(( Telepathy is a form of communication. You wouldn't be able to use it while asleep. ))Telepathy isn't one way. It's like having super-hearing, but for brainwaves. You can actually still listen while sleeping.
Just like talking isn't one-way. Even if you can listen, doesn't mean you hear everything going on around you while you're asleep.(( Telepathy is a form of communication. You wouldn't be able to use it while asleep. ))Telepathy isn't one way. It's like having super-hearing, but for brainwaves. You can actually still listen while sleeping.
"I should mention now it's gonna cost 75 gold per week just to feed us all...not including chickens but they may pay their own way in eggs.""Does that count booze?
"Sweet! I was gonna call third floor!
How big are the beds? Are we allowed to have... guests over?"
"I dunno. I just didn't want to get yelled at. I don't usually live with other people. I tend to bounce around from place to place.""Sweet! I was gonna call third floor!
How big are the beds? Are we allowed to have... guests over?"
"I work for you why are you asking me permission?"
Cusic picks hippo up. Huggles it and puts it down again, expecting some sort of response.
"Also if we're keeping the chickens we'll need a coop for them. If we're keeping the hippo we may want a pool."A coop and a pool is a good idea. I wouldn't mind using the latter myself
Mustave looks for his ghostly peer. Assuming he finds him:First off, I'm no longer a ghost.
"Ceusharath, is there a such thing as ghost beer, or something? Like an ethereal ale or incorporeal IPA or whatever? I have a friend I wanted to shop for. I didn't know if that sorta stuff existed, and if it did, if there was a way I could carry it. Like force bottles, or something."
First off, I'm no longer a ghost.I forgot all about that!
Yeah, just put the beer with their body, at which point they get a ghostly version of it that they can drink. I tested it around the time my coffin arrived."Excellent! Thanks!"
venn, flay, robby and konner?I thought we established I'm shopping.
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Cusic quickly opens the door
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@BHU(click to show/hide)
"Why, do angry mobs always seem to form where ever I am?" Joseph says acting confused at all the different people
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"I am sorry if you are bothered by my presence, ladies, but I assure you that I am a scholar and wizard by trade. Well... was. It's complicated."
Bigsley attempts to hunch down a bit to appear less menacing, though at his height, it's not very effective.
"ummm...... well you see....." Joseph says not really understanding how it is racist"Why, do angry mobs always seem to form where ever I am?" Joseph says acting confused at all the different people
"HOW DARE YOU CALL ME ANGRY!! THAT'S RACIST!"
It's an orc...
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Bigsley opens up his chestplate, revealing the empty space inside.
"I assure you, that would be quite impossible. If I am to believe what I was told, this proposed mate must possess a pulse. I have not had one of those for a little while, now."
Cusic waves at the catgirl and completely blanks the rest of the crowd.
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"You fuckin' deaf? Where's the owner?"I'm sorry, but you seem to have our establishment mistaken for another type of business. As such, there is no owner of a shithole brothel here. Unless your here expecting to sabotage the competition.
"Maybe you'd like help with crowd control?"I think I can handle that, be we are always looking for new recruits, especially if you think your capable of it.
"You look hot, are you an experienced bath toweler?"I'd advise you to back off, while you yet live.
"FREE HIPPOS NOW!!"No, we aren't running a give away right now. you seem upset, is there something you'd like to talk about?
"I has noms!"So you do. And what brings you here today?
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"OMG IT'S SO SNUGGLY I COULD DIE!:Okay, could you please come inside? (only to those two)
"Nice mascot."
"Using animals for sexual purposes is against the law."Please either leave or form a neat line so as to present your grievances one by one.
"ANIMALS ARE NOT FOR YOUR PERSONAL FUN!"
Bill comes out to join the others at the door and sighs before he start to speak. We never get a quiet moment, do we? What is all the commotion about this time and do you need a hand?
Bill accepts it the basket with a bow and a quick wink of understanding Thank you, madame. I'm sure it will be much appreciated.
"I still say it's racist calling us a mob. Racist squirrel employin' motherfuckers...now where was i...oh yes. I'm here to ensure you're Guild doesn't discriminate against people of uncommon race."I don't plan on it, and most of the other founders don't seem to plan on it. While some of our employes may be bias'd, the group as a whole is not. Giving our employees leeway in their actions doesn't make the group racist.