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Uncle Kittie's Hopefully Humorous Guide to Abominations / Re: Jesters Realm Critters
« on: November 27, 2023, 08:22:24 PM »
Devil Monkey, Bigger
Large Outsider (Chaos, Evil, Extraplanar)
Hit Dice: 13d8+39 (97 hp)
Initiative: +8
Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares), Climb 15 ft.
Armor Class: 22 (-1 Size, -4 Frenzy, +4 Dex, +13 Natural), touch 9, flat-footed 18
Base Attack/Grapple: +13/+28
Attack: Claw +23 melee (2d4+11)
Full Attack: 3 Claws +23 melee (2d4+11) and 1 Bite +23 melee (1d8+5)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks: Frenzy
Special Qualities: See in Darkness, Immune to Fire and Poison, Energy Resistance 10 (Acid, Cold), DR 10/Good, SR 22
Saves: Fort +13, Ref +12, Will +11
Abilities: Str 32, Dex 19, Con 16, Int 6, Wis 12, Cha 12
Skills: Balance +14, Climb +19, Escape Artist +17, Hide +10, Intimidate +17, Jump +24, Listen +17, Move Silently +14, Spot +17
Feats: Great Fortitude, Improved Initiative, Improved Multiattack, Iron Will, Multiattack
Environment: Any
Organization: Solitary or Pair
Challenge Rating: 11
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always Chaotic Evil
Advancement: 14-19 (Large)
Level Adjustment: ---
Further efforts to improve the grenades resulted in Devil Monkeys the size of Ogres. Unsurprisingly, they're even less controllable than the previous critters.
Frenzy (Ex): A side effect of their botched summoning is that Devil Monkeys are permanently subject to Frenzy (changes to stats are included in the statblock). This gives it a +6 bonus to Strength and, if it makes a full attack action, gains a single extra attack each round at it's highest bonus. (This latter effect is not cumulative with haste or other effects that grant additional attacks.) However, it also takes a —4 penalty to Armor Class and takes 2 points of damage per round (this damage cannot be prevented), dying when it reaches 0 hp. The effects of Frenzy stack with those from any rage ability the character may have.
The Devil Monkey cannot use any Charisma-, or Intelligence-based skills (except for Intimidate), the Concentration skill, or any abilities that require patience or concentration, nor can it cast spells, drink potions, activate magic items, or read scrolls. It can use any feat it has except Combat Expertise, item creation feats, or metamagic feats.
During a Frenzy, the creature must attack any other being it perceives (other than fellow Devil Monkeys).
See in Darkness (Su): Devil Monkeys can see perfectly in darkness of any kind, even that created by a Deeper Darkness spell.
Skills: Devil Monkeys have a +8 racial bonus on Balance and Climb checks. They can always choose to take 10 on Climb checks, even if rushed or threatened. They use their Dexterity modifier or their Strength modifier for Climb checks, whichever is higher.
Combat: The size may have changed, but the tactics have not.
Barrel of Monkeys Grenade: Pineapple
Price (Item Level): 7650 GP
Body Slot: - (Held)
Caster Level: 17th
Aura: Strong; (DC:24) Conjuration
Activation: Standard (Thrown)
Weight: 1/2 lb.
Still feeling left out that the Monkey Grenades weren't reaching their full potential the Martians made one last research attempt for the ultimate weapon, and got this: an oversized Grenade that summons an Ogre sized Monkey. This is thrown like the other weapons, and much like the other critters the Monkey is subject to Frenzy and remains that way until at 0 hp.
Prerequisites: Craft Wondrous Item, Summon Monster IX, Rage
Cost to Create: 3825 GP, 8 days, 306 XP
Barrel of Monkeys Grenade: Pineapple
Wondrous item, legendary
This item looks like a large pineapple weighing about 24 ounces. You can use an action to throw the grenade up to 60 feet. The grenade explodes on impact and is destroyed, leaving behind a Bigger Devil Monkey that attacks the nearest creature it can perceive. Once that being is dead, it will move on to the next closest being (including the wielder of this grenade) until 1 Minute has passed or until it reaches 0 hit points (whichever comes first).
Devil Monkey, Bigger
"How much bigger?"
It Just Keeps Getting Worse
"How do you sleep at night?"
"Well, at first they were just the size of chimps."
"What do you mean, at first?"
"They kept experimenting."
"Seriously?"
"And we found out the bigger they get, the madder they are."
"They get worse than this?"
"Yeah, kinda..."
"So where are you at now in the process?"
The Bigger, The Meaner
"We turned it over to some Archmages."
"And it didn't get better from there?"
"Oh hell no."
"Wait, aren't you worried the Devils will sue over this?"
"Dunno. We haven't proved these are Devils despite the similarities, they've never been spotted anywhere else outside of being summoned here, and there's no evidence of them in the Afterlife even."
Large Outsider (Chaos, Evil, Extraplanar)
Hit Dice: 13d8+39 (97 hp)
Initiative: +8
Speed: 30 ft. (6 squares), Climb 15 ft.
Armor Class: 22 (-1 Size, -4 Frenzy, +4 Dex, +13 Natural), touch 9, flat-footed 18
Base Attack/Grapple: +13/+28
Attack: Claw +23 melee (2d4+11)
Full Attack: 3 Claws +23 melee (2d4+11) and 1 Bite +23 melee (1d8+5)
Space/Reach: 10 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks: Frenzy
Special Qualities: See in Darkness, Immune to Fire and Poison, Energy Resistance 10 (Acid, Cold), DR 10/Good, SR 22
Saves: Fort +13, Ref +12, Will +11
Abilities: Str 32, Dex 19, Con 16, Int 6, Wis 12, Cha 12
Skills: Balance +14, Climb +19, Escape Artist +17, Hide +10, Intimidate +17, Jump +24, Listen +17, Move Silently +14, Spot +17
Feats: Great Fortitude, Improved Initiative, Improved Multiattack, Iron Will, Multiattack
Environment: Any
Organization: Solitary or Pair
Challenge Rating: 11
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always Chaotic Evil
Advancement: 14-19 (Large)
Level Adjustment: ---
Further efforts to improve the grenades resulted in Devil Monkeys the size of Ogres. Unsurprisingly, they're even less controllable than the previous critters.
Frenzy (Ex): A side effect of their botched summoning is that Devil Monkeys are permanently subject to Frenzy (changes to stats are included in the statblock). This gives it a +6 bonus to Strength and, if it makes a full attack action, gains a single extra attack each round at it's highest bonus. (This latter effect is not cumulative with haste or other effects that grant additional attacks.) However, it also takes a —4 penalty to Armor Class and takes 2 points of damage per round (this damage cannot be prevented), dying when it reaches 0 hp. The effects of Frenzy stack with those from any rage ability the character may have.
The Devil Monkey cannot use any Charisma-, or Intelligence-based skills (except for Intimidate), the Concentration skill, or any abilities that require patience or concentration, nor can it cast spells, drink potions, activate magic items, or read scrolls. It can use any feat it has except Combat Expertise, item creation feats, or metamagic feats.
During a Frenzy, the creature must attack any other being it perceives (other than fellow Devil Monkeys).
See in Darkness (Su): Devil Monkeys can see perfectly in darkness of any kind, even that created by a Deeper Darkness spell.
Skills: Devil Monkeys have a +8 racial bonus on Balance and Climb checks. They can always choose to take 10 on Climb checks, even if rushed or threatened. They use their Dexterity modifier or their Strength modifier for Climb checks, whichever is higher.
Combat: The size may have changed, but the tactics have not.
Barrel of Monkeys Grenade: Pineapple
Price (Item Level): 7650 GP
Body Slot: - (Held)
Caster Level: 17th
Aura: Strong; (DC:24) Conjuration
Activation: Standard (Thrown)
Weight: 1/2 lb.
Still feeling left out that the Monkey Grenades weren't reaching their full potential the Martians made one last research attempt for the ultimate weapon, and got this: an oversized Grenade that summons an Ogre sized Monkey. This is thrown like the other weapons, and much like the other critters the Monkey is subject to Frenzy and remains that way until at 0 hp.
Prerequisites: Craft Wondrous Item, Summon Monster IX, Rage
Cost to Create: 3825 GP, 8 days, 306 XP
Barrel of Monkeys Grenade: Pineapple
Wondrous item, legendary
This item looks like a large pineapple weighing about 24 ounces. You can use an action to throw the grenade up to 60 feet. The grenade explodes on impact and is destroyed, leaving behind a Bigger Devil Monkey that attacks the nearest creature it can perceive. Once that being is dead, it will move on to the next closest being (including the wielder of this grenade) until 1 Minute has passed or until it reaches 0 hit points (whichever comes first).
Devil Monkey, Bigger
"How much bigger?"
It Just Keeps Getting Worse
"How do you sleep at night?"
"Well, at first they were just the size of chimps."
"What do you mean, at first?"
"They kept experimenting."
"Seriously?"
"And we found out the bigger they get, the madder they are."
"They get worse than this?"
"Yeah, kinda..."
"So where are you at now in the process?"
The Bigger, The Meaner
"We turned it over to some Archmages."
"And it didn't get better from there?"
"Oh hell no."
"Wait, aren't you worried the Devils will sue over this?"
"Dunno. We haven't proved these are Devils despite the similarities, they've never been spotted anywhere else outside of being summoned here, and there's no evidence of them in the Afterlife even."