-
"Kobolds? Kobolds still exist?"
-
"I know, yes? When I first saw them spawn into existence I said to myself they wouldn't even last an eon, but the ugly little buggers proved quite tenacious and hard working so they now actually have their own lands and leaders. Also helps that they multiply pretty fast I guess."
-
"Are there still humans?"
-
Yes, pretty popular too. You don't get out much, do you? I respect hard workers, but everybody needs a vacation now and then. I'm sure the kobolds will give you some paid time off to see the world.
-
"Paid time off?" :blink
-
Vacations, yes, one of the greatest inventions of the last centuries. You'll need to negotiate properly but I'm sure a mutual understanding agreement can be reached with the kobolds.
However before discussing your new contracts we still need to run a proper inspection of the facilities. So if any of you could serve as a guide through all the traps and passages or provide me a map, I would really appreciate it.
-
"The facilities are in bad disrepair. We keep our section pristine, but squatters abound elsewhere. And loafers as well. We can show you around most places, though you may attract some unwelcome attention not being an ooze and all."
-
Oh, you're oozes? Quite geometric. Also I guess you indeed don't have eyes or hands or feet, just hard to be 100% sure when you're so transparent.
I can take care of myself, this scythe's not just for show, you know? Or dig away or teleport if things get too hard, hahaha.
So if you don't mind first you can start by showing me the way to where I left my friend co-workers waiting since the passage was blocked by degrees and I burrowed ahead. I think it was roughly in that direction. Near the entrance to the surface or something.
Morte returns to her Xorn shape while speaking while doing her best to describe the direction where the rest of the party is so the ooze cubes can guide her to it through a more open route.
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"Cave in that way, we haven't ever cleared it cause..you know.. no hands..."
"Also last we checked when it was open that was Beholder territory."
you got knowledge dungeoneering?
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(no)
That doesn't sound very good. Anybody around here with hands that could help us clear the rubble? Some golems maybe?
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"Nah, the old owners don't like the 'randomly go berserk and tear stuff down' aspect of Constructs."
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Well surely you have somebody here to take care of heavy duty repairs. Even if nobody tears it, stuff eventually goes down by itself.
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"Used to be Fiends or slaves did that. Fiends left to take care of business, promising to return. The slaves revolted and took over, and eventually died of old age. Also, we ate a few when they tried to exterminate us."
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Yeah, it's annoying when the mortals suddenly rebel and think they can just destroy us.
So who else is nearby that would be willing to speak first and only try to eat me second?
-
"Unsure. The prison is pretty darn big, and we've been cut off from much of it forever. Before most of us were born even."
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Which areas you still have access to then? You said you could show me around most places, so we can start on that from friendliest neighbours we can reach right now and work our way from there.
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"Well the Mites used to be over to the left. They're usually ...bribe-able."
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Morte grins while pulling some of her ghostly gold coins and clinking them in her hand.
Where I originally came from money is the ultimate argument so anybody bribe-able sounds perfect! Lead the way!
-
You head down a long wall, and at some point hear "Halt! Who trespasses!" in a squeaky voice.
-
Menina Morte, and those are Ruby, Saphire, Emerald, Big Bones and the rest of our merry group. Just getting to meet our new neighbours. To who do we owe the pleasure?
-
ooc: For those who didnt peek in the chatting thred yer all here now
"Ain't no pleasure here lady, just sharp, rusty metal in yer toes. State yer bidness!"
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ooc: For those who didnt peek in the chatting thred yer all here now
At this point, Mustave was planning on Morte continuing to talk, since she's seen more of the place.
-
"Ain't no pleasure here lady, just sharp, rusty metal in yer toes. State yer bidness!"
"Aye aye, business before pleasure. We've helped the kobolds drive away the devils from this dungeon, which now claim ownership of this place and so we're checking the premises to find out the layout and for any other problems that may need to be taken care of. I'm certain we can reach some kind of agreement that will be mutually benefitable for all parties here as soon as you tell me what you do and what you want. Like seems this place has been sealed for quite some time, but now there's a whole bright world out there with plenty of new nice things the kobolds could trade for your services. Besides plenty of money to be made."
(30 on diplomacy to help (http://minmaxforum.com/index.php?topic=17746.msg337918#msg337918))
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" You hirin' robbers then?"
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"We were just liberating the kobolds and checking the place out."
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" You hirin' robbers then?"
As a matter of fact we could use somebody skilled in traps to navigate around this place. There's quite a bit of them scattered around. And kobolds love to make traps, so after disarming the old ones they'll probably need help setting new stuff.
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"An alliance with Kobolds eh..."
"They thinking of rebuilding?"
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They already started rebuilding, the little buggers cleaning up the rubble in the blocked passages at the top levels as we speak.
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"Kobolds are usually ok, we'll meet with them. The oozes told youo bout the Beholders yet? They've gone a bit crackers over the centureis."
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"I seem to remember hearing about 'beholder territory'."
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"Yeah, the cubes mentioned those beholders. Any tips on how to best deal with them?"
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"Avoid them. Seriously, they're batshit crazy and it's been made worse with the inbreeding."
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"Is there a particular spot to avoid?"
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"Anybody else nearby that we may be willing to talk things out?"
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"Cave in's have separated much of the complex over the years. Honestly were not sure what to avoid, the slimes and us were cut off these last few centuries, and the Beholders war among themselves to the point we avoid going near them. Trust me you'll know when you're in their territory."
-
"Any suggestions on where to investigate with the least likelihood of triggering a cave-in?"
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"Everybody keeps warning us to avoid those beholders, I'm getting the feeling we'll run into them sooner or later...
Anyway those slimes any friendly? Because I can borrow through stone so even if the passage's blocked I should be able to reach them if you'll just point me in the right direction."
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"The cubes are a decent sort. They keep the place clean and keep the riff raff out."
"Yer on yer own regarding the cave-in's. Were mercenaries, not Dwarves."
-
"So, if we don't know where we're going, and we don't know what is in any given direction, I guess we could just go anywhere, so long as we track our progress. How about... that way?" Mustave seems to pick a passage at random.
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"I'm fine that plan."
Morte starts walking in the direction Mustave pointed out.
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As you walk down a dusty hallway you come to a set of doors engraved with a Devil's Face which animates and says "Password?"
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"Mellon."
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"Swordfish."
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"You're new aren't you?"
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"Yes. The old owners kinda left without telling us anything about passwords, so maybe we can reset it? I bet you haven't opened in ages. And what's a door that's never opened? I bet you're itching for it."
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"Do you have the authorization code for a password reset?" :devil
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Yep, you were made by the devils alright. Look, we can do this nicely or we can find a way to break you down.
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"I always love when people go around the door. They never think to trap the walls..."
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Pat begins examining the walls to see if they look load-bearing.
Knowledge:(Architecture & Engineering) check:
Rolled 1d20+11 : 12 + 11, total 23
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they do indeed
"Breaking me is inadvisable. If there is evidence the original owners are gone the new owners and I can come to some form of agreement. Rumor has it they're Kobolds."
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"They are kobolds. Do you need to meet them?"
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"Indeed I do."
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"We'll be back in a bit."
OOC: I don't remember if we had to teleport to get here, or if we can get back to the kobolds easily.
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it will take some time but you can bring them. They seem to get along with the Mites and oozes ok.
"Is this the head runt in charge?"
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"As much as I can be."
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"No, I meant the Kobold"
Kobold: "Hey now!!"
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"Don't worry, man. I think 'runt' is a term of endearment to these guys."
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"No, it means he's a runt."
"HEY!"
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"So... can you two come to some agreement about getting this door open?"
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"Sure, I'm just waiting for the runt to make an offer"
"LOOK YOU SPECIESIST MOTHERFUCKER, YOU CHILL WITH THAT RUNT BULLSHIT OR I WILL GO FULL DRAGON ON YOUR ASS! I WILL BURN THUS MOTHERFUCKER DOWN!"
:o "Noted."
"NOW OPEN THAT FUCKIN' DOOR SO I CAN SEE THE MERCHANDISE AND GIVE A QUOTE!"
the door opens quietly
-
"That went better than expected."
Morte peeks inside the opened door.
-
Mustave defers to the kobolds, for the time being.
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There's a long hall that ends in a bend. You can see a faint glow coming from around the corner, along with sounds of muffled revelry.
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You there, yes you, go see what's making that noise and come back.
Morte sends in one of her expendable "dolls" around the corner then come back right away and checks if anything follows or if there's any sound changes.
-
(sorry for the delay, I've put in 140 hours in the last two oweeks)
There is much noise and cries of consternation as the skelly enters. What languages do you alll speak?
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All the languages (Morte has perma-Tongues on self).
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It's some ancient variant of a fiendish language
"What the fuck? Is that a skeleton?"
"I bet this means intruders or robbers."
"Maybe they bring new and interesting forms of beer"
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Morte telepathically relays the translation to her present allies and then asks them also telepathically:
"Don't suppose any of you have any modern beer with you? We could try to smooth things up here with an offering of fresh new booze. Or at least with the promise of some."
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"Don't suppose any of you have any modern beer with you? We could try to smooth things up here with an offering of fresh new booze. Or at least with the promise of some."
"Actually yes, let me look here.... I've got two ales, three porters and five IPAs. All of them local from my homeland, I'm not sure if that counts as modern.
-
For us immortal fiends that's super modern, in particular when one has been stuck in the same dungeon for who knows how many thousands of years. Some of the guys I've met here didn't even know mortals have spread out all over the surface and even formed their own nations!
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"I've got some good quality liquor, and if they're feeling brave, some variety of moonshine."
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It is great to have to such good co-workers. I'll try to draw them out then, get your spirits ready!
Then Morte sends a telephatic "scream" to whoever's around the corner.
WE'RE NOT ROBBERS, THIS DUNGEON IS UNDER NEW ADMINISTRATION AND WE'RE CHECKING THE PREMISES! WE ALSO HAVE NEW BOOZE FROM THE SURFACE! FIRST SAMPLES FREE!
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A pack of fat, balding humanoid figures with large neck wattles carrying steins rounds the corner.
"What sort of booze stranger?" knowledge the planes or religion checks
-
Untrained Knowledge checks (max DC 10):
Religion = 1d20:
Rolled 1d20 : 10, total 10
The Planes = 1d20:
Rolled 1d20 : 5, total 5
"I have some whiskey, and something called 'dew', which I guess is like moonshine."
-
Trained Knowledge Religion
Rolled 1d20+6 : 11 + 6, total 17
Untrained Knowledge the Plains (max DC 10)
Rolled 1d20+5 : 5 + 5, total 10
-
(meant knowledge The Planes for that second one).
-
Pat is not trained in Knowledge:Religion or Knowledge:The Planes.
"A variety of ales, porters, and IPA's, my friend. All brewed by some good pals of mine who would appreciate any feedback you have about them."
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Os
These are Birraloths, a form of Yugoloth retired from the Blood War. They are renownend brewmasters.
-
Morte telepathically informs her allies:
Those fine fellows are Birraloths, a form of Yugoloth retired from the Blood War. They are renownend brewmasters so booze should be serious business for them.
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"Hopefully they don't hate my offerings."
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"Well shit, come on in then. Welcome to the Bar."
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"Thanks! We're trying to learn about this dungeon."
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"You said there are new owners?"
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"Yep!"
Mustave explains the circumstances.
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"So what happened to the prisoners?"
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Prisioners? What prisioners? We only found the local staff and some skeletons so far.
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"Awwwwwww shit...." :twitch
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"Are there some dangerous folks running around here now, or what?"
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Also what was your job down here? Were you the local brewmasters?
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"Are there some dangerous folks running around here now, or what?"
"We guarded the worst of the worst. Well, others guarded we provided booze."
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"We guarded the worst of the worst. Well, others guarded we provided booze."
"I mean, that's important, too. So who are we looking for?"
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"Fiends and entities of power on their level. Gawds I hope Henderson hasn't made his way out..."
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"What would happen if he did?"
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"Shenanigans"
"Evil shenanigans."
"The Blood War would prolly flare up."
"Sun might go black and cows would purr."
"Chickens spontaneously exploding."
"Garden Gnomes would become suspicious out of necessity."
-
So, out of pure curiosity, do you have any contigency plan about what to do in the theoretical case this hypothetical Henderson got out? It's not like you can see the sun down here and not a lot of farm animals either. Or garden gnomes. Or gardens.
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"Standard plan was to blow the place up if iit looked like he'd get out."
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"Ah. Well, good thing the gnomes haven't turned black and the sun isn't suspicious. I think everything's fine, for now."
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"Wait...do you know of his whereabouts?"
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"Who said anything about that? I said the world isn't ending, so we must be fine."
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bluff checks plz
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Bluff = 1d20+16
Rolled 1d20+16 : 19 + 16, total 35
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What profit would we gain from lying to you?
Bluff Rolled 1d20+5 : 3 + 5, total 8
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Bluff
Rolled 1d20+17 : 9 + 17, total 26
Though Pat hasn't really been part of most of the conversation.
-
They believe you when you say you don't know of him, but do seema little cynical about Os' comment on nothing to gain. You are a Fiend after all.
-
"So, what do you know about this area?"
-
"Well sir, were mostly former mercenaries who decided to abandon the Blood War once we got snatched here. The place kind of fell apart after a long time, and we just decided to stay amongst ourselves and sell beer to the Mites. Paranoid buggers them Mites. Not as crazy as the Beholders tho. Those guys went batshit from years of inbreeding over there."
-
OOC: I've kind of forgotten what we're doing. In the broadest sense, I thought we were exploring the ruins, but I've lost track of if was had some more specific objective.
-
OOC: Kobolds climed the ruins but hired us to "clean up" any traps and hostiles, we can grab anything that isn't nailed down for ourselves, the kobolds main interest is the dungeon complex itself.
-
"So, are there any areas around here that are still trapped that you avoid?"
-
"Oh hell yes. There's th Beholders, and there's Passage 43. We walled it off Scary shit in that place."
-
"What's down there? Worse than beholders?"
-
Don't suppose you have a map or could draw us one? Also why everybody scared of those 'beholders'? I've never met one, but with a name like that what's the worst they could do, stare really hard at us?
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"What's down there? Worse than beholders?"
"We don't know whats down there, and we don't want to."
-
Don't suppose you have a map or could draw us one? Also why everybody scared of those 'beholders'? I've never met one, but with a name like that what's the worst they could do, stare really hard at us?
"Yes. Yes they stare very hard."
-
Mustave looks at the rest of the group: "Shall we take the path less traveled, stare down some beholders, or does anyone have a better idea?
Personally, I'd say go the first route."
-
Yes, let's stay here and get drunk.
...
Wait, you said better idea?
My vote's for that path less traveled then.
-
what say the rest of you?
-
Vlad? You out there?
-
Okay they show you to the locked steel (?) door covering the Tunnel.
"Y'all sure 'bout this?"
-
"I mean, I seldom pause long enough to be sure about anything, but this is as close to a 'yes' as you'll probably get."
-
"You know we're gonna lock the door behind you right?"
-
"Can we come back out later if we say the password?"
-
"I can also just ferry us around with teleport if nothing else works."
-
"Can we come back out later if we say the password?"
"We'd need to know it was you. You could be tortured for the password. Got anything personal you could tell us?"
-
"My girlfriend is a ghost who sings out her butt? I guess that works. Kind of a long password, though. She goes by 'Analstasia', so that might work."
-
"I lost my virginity to an angel back during the five devil lords celestial war."
-
"Wow, you two live in interesting times. You got Darkvision?"
-
"Wow, you two live in interesting times. You got Darkvision?"
"Nope"
-
"Yes."
-
They hand you a few torches, open the door after listening for a few minutes, and then shut it behind you wishing you godspeed.
It is an extremely dusty tunnel, obviously long untouched. Air musut be coming from somewhere tho cause it's not too musty.
-
"Shall we have Pat take point to check for traps?"
-
(any objections?)
-
(Obviously Mustave is fine with his own suggestion ;) ).
-
(one of Morte's dolls going on front just in case)
-
I assume y'all are stealthing it?
-
Sure.
Hide = 1d20+8
Rolled 1d20+8 : 17 + 8, total 25
Move Silently = 1d20+6
Rolled 1d20+6 : 18 + 6, total 24
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Morte's Hide
Rolled 1d20+17 : 13 + 17, total 30
Morte's Move Silently:
Rolled 1d20+5 : 12 + 5, total 17
Front Doll's hide
Rolled 1d20+3 : 6 + 3, total 9
Front Doll's move silently:
Rolled 1d20+3 : 10 + 3, total 13
-
You find 2 fiendish guards of a type unknown to you dead asleep.
-
How big are they?
Mustave looks to Morte, quietly: "I don't know much about these kinds of guys. Do you recognize them?"
-
(do they have wings or weapons?)
Morte spends some time scratching her head trying to remember anything like those guards.
"...Nope, nothing comes to mind. But if they are relaxed enough to sleep on the job, they're relaxed enough to try to talk things out. Hopefully."
Saying that, Morte spins her scythe around, tearing a small rift in the air from which come out a couple of floating pink spirit balls that go and hover silently around the guards.
Initiating Malice Sign "Irresolute Bound Spirit"-attach one spirit to each guard, inflicting them with a -5 penalty to skill checks, then fullround action to recover maneuver and produce another spirit. adjacent to Morte.
-
(do they have wings or weapons?)
Morte spends some time scratching her head trying to remember anything like those guards.
"...Nope, nothing comes to mind. But if they are relaxed enough to sleep on the job, they're relaxed enough to try to talk things out. Hopefully."
Saying that, Morte spins her scythe around, tearing a small rift in the air from which come out a couple of floating pink spirit balls that go and hover silently around the guards.
Initiating Malice Sign "Irresolute Bound Spirit"-attach one spirit to each guard, inflicting them with a -5 penalty to skill checks, then fullround action to recover maneuver and produce another spirit. adjacent to Morte.
no wings or weapons, does your maneuver make any noise?
-
How big are they?
Mustave looks to Morte, quietly: "I don't know much about these kinds of guys. Do you recognize them?"
large
-
(the maneuver would make as much sound as swinging a scythe through the air, no special sonic effects).
-
They do not appear to awaken.
-
anyone out there?
-
(Sorry. I thought we were waiting on Morte to follow through with her maneuver.)
-
Maneuver complete, they still sleep.
-
Is there room to just get around them?
-
Yer small so yer ok. Os will have to squueze tho, as will the skellies.
-
To Morte, quietly: "I could probably sneak past, but I don't know how you want to handle it with your companions."
-
Mustave will sneak around them and see what there is past them.
Move Silently = 1d20+6
Rolled 1d20+6 : 15 + 6, total 21
If needed, Hide = 1d20+8
Rolled 1d20+8 : 4 + 8, total 12
-
Fortunately for you there is an empty, unlit tunnel.
-
Mustave motions for the others to follow.