Author Topic: Awesome stuff you have to share, V4  (Read 31558 times)

Offline Nanshork

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Re: Awesome stuff you have to share, V4
« Reply #420 on: June 26, 2018, 06:33:52 PM »
So tonight we had to pitch our proposed business model in class. Teacher instructed us to make it "short and memorable".
<a picture of a pink bear on a couch with Harry Van Pottersing in the foreground>
But what's the business model?
Customized FTTX internet.
Marketing needs some work, try linking the advertisement to the product.  :P

US ads don't need that, why should Kuro?  :P

Offline Kuroimaken

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Re: Awesome stuff you have to share, V4
« Reply #421 on: June 26, 2018, 11:43:23 PM »
I was going to shoot a fiber optic cable into the room and zipline in, but my budget was shot after I got the hat.

Also, who you calling Harry Potter? It's not like he has a monopoly on round-lensed glasses. I liked those before he used them.  :P

Kami darou ga akuma darou ga, ore no michi ni tateru mono NASHI!!

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Offline Necrosnoop110

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Re: Awesome stuff you have to share, V4
« Reply #422 on: June 27, 2018, 12:23:18 PM »
As a non-video gamer, I never heard this one before, not sure how well known this story is. But I found it to be hilariously fantastic.


Asheron's Call's Shard Of Harry

     The entire history of mythology is unrelenting douchebaggery, from heroes deciding that murder is cool as long as the victims are a different race to gods bending cosmic forces to screw over someone who forgot to say thanks once. And on Asheron's Call's Thistledown server, one group transcended this divine dickishness to become legend. The game ran a year-long story triggered by players shattering precious crystals, because chasing shiny objects and killing things are all MMO gamers ever do. Unless you want them to, in which case they'll do the exact opposite.

     The "Defenders of the Shard" set up camp around the sixth and final crystal, the Shard of the Herald, the prison of Bael' Zhaeron, Hopeslayer. Also, they nicknamed it Harry. 24 hours a day they defended it against other players and sacrificed themselves to it, because Asheron's Call monsters can level up by killing players. The Harry Krishnas impaled themselves on His Spikiness until He was practically invincible. This one group was holding up the next update for every server of the entire game. The developers, in the awesome manner of movie bad guys, stepped in to fight the players on their own level. Instead of simply rewriting the crystal as gone, they appeared in-game as mythical characters and called two high-level players to join their attack. These players had completed an earlier quest making them indebted to the story's cause, but brilliantly, one had already defected and was now a Disciple of Harry.

     The admins donned their epic weapons, sallied forth ... and promptly got their asses kicked. They were killed by their own players in a world they'd built, making this officially a science fiction movie. 20 Turbine staff watching on a break room screen were treated to players jumping up and down on the admins' corpses. Because Asheron's Call doesn't have a crouch button. Worse, Harry had resisted command-level instructions to power down. The staff joked that He had attained sentience. Understand: If a computer program ever escapes and kills us, it won't be because of the military. It'll be because gamers trained it to. The staff tried again. And again. The third time, they got lucky in their own game, and instead of banning people, they paid tribute to their valiant foes. The Thistledown server got a unique monument, the "Shard Vigil Memorial," honoring the players who had kicked the company's ass for so long.

Source: http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-7-most-elaborate-dick-moves-in-online-gaming-history/
Video: https://youtu.be/OnemGvYLOZQ

Offline SorO_Lost

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Re: Awesome stuff you have to share, V4
« Reply #423 on: June 28, 2018, 09:27:29 AM »
Also, who you calling Harry Potter?
Not me, HP is for chumps. You are Harry Von Pottersing. By day you are a student trying to score decent grades, fit in with normal people, and work out your romantic issues but by night you use your patronus blessed crossbow to hunt and kill a creepy nose-less Nasfaru vampire's coven to avenge your parents. It's not a story about incompetent adults and one very lucky kid, but a story about a kid that learns to stab things in the heart with the Sword of Griffondor to prevent his enemies from raising from the grave.  :cool
Would you die if you jumped from my perceived ego to your IQ? - Is 15secs of confirmation bias a goal post worth arguing for? - Ever asked a "victim" what they did to deserve it? - Are the words teen, SJW, & liberal synonyms? - "Only Sith deals in absolutes" contains a misspelled word.

Offline brujon

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Re: Awesome stuff you have to share, V4
« Reply #424 on: June 28, 2018, 05:17:14 PM »
Also, who you calling Harry Potter?
Not me, HP is for chumps. You are Harry Von Pottersing. By day you are a student trying to score decent grades, fit in with normal people, and work out your romantic issues but by night you use your patronus blessed crossbow to hunt and kill a creepy nose-less Nasfaru vampire's coven to avenge your parents. It's not a story about incompetent adults and one very lucky kid, but a story about a kid that learns to stab things in the heart with the Sword of Griffondor to prevent his enemies from raising from the grave.  :cool

I'd legit watch this movie
"All the pride and pleasure of the world, mirrored in the dull consciousness of a fool, are poor indeed compared with the imagination of Cervantes writing his Don Quixote in a miserable prison" - Schopenhauer, Aphorisms: The Wisdom of Life

Offline Kuroimaken

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Re: Awesome stuff you have to share, V4
« Reply #425 on: June 28, 2018, 08:55:46 PM »
Also, who you calling Harry Potter?
Not me, HP is for chumps. You are Harry Von Pottersing. By day you are a student trying to score decent grades, fit in with normal people, and work out your romantic issues but by night you use your patronus blessed crossbow to hunt and kill a creepy nose-less Nasfaru vampire's coven to avenge your parents. It's not a story about incompetent adults and one very lucky kid, but a story about a kid that learns to stab things in the heart with the Sword of Griffondor to prevent his enemies from raising from the grave.  :cool
...OK, I'd star in that.

OH NO, PROFESSOR SNIPE HAS BEEN TURNED! But my Long Term Finances test is tomorrow! Can I find a way to turn him back BEFORE he grades my test?!
« Last Edit: June 28, 2018, 09:02:45 PM by Kuroimaken »
Kami darou ga akuma darou ga, ore no michi ni tateru mono NASHI!!

Give me internets. Now.