Being bipolar sucks. I'm managing it, but goddamn do i have to take the stairs instead of the elevator on shit everytime, it's killing me. People that don't go through this shit have such an easier time, if only they knew what it was like... But i guess it's like when you never really think anything about how awesome it is to breathe with both nostrils unobstructed, and then you get a cold and suddenly you feel fucking horrible because you can't breathe properly. Only those who really walked these shoes will know how it is.
Brujon, far be it from me to make light of your pain. I know some people who are bipolar, have lived with some of them all my life. I can't say I know what it feels
like, but I can certainly understand why
they feel like shit when they do (when the hypo side hits it hits hard, and I'm no stranger to depression). Having to rein in your emotions is not easy for anybody, doubly so if you can't figure them out in the first place (case in point, me). What I can tell you, though: it does, eventually
, get a little easier with practice and knowing what's wrong. Key thing to remember at those times is that they're momentary and they'll pass. They hurt like hell, but they'll pass. If you still feel like you can't handle them, put that bursting energy to something. Getting your mind off of itself helps.
I don't mean to come across like I'm giving you an easy answer or making light of your problems, far from it. I want you to know that I acknowledge your emotions and I'm merely trying to help you find a way to deal with them. Unfortunately, I also know that at those times hardly anything ever gets through. It sucks when the best you can do is tell someone to hang in there, but that's all that's within my power to do right now. I can't punch the sad out of people yet.