Author Topic: Campaign Thread V: Boobies in the Basement Make up for an Otherwise Dull Day  (Read 94895 times)

Offline bhu

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Campaign Thread I

Campaign Thread II: The Sequel

Campaign Thread III: Zombie Weenus

Campaign Thread !V: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods

Campaign Thread V


When last we left our intrepid hero's you were all gathered at your new place cleaning and enduring lots of weirdness when a lunatic cleric burst in demanding you shut down this house of filth.

Ooc: There is no way I'm transcribing 5 whole threads of campaign material  :P

So links are above.

Offline VennDygrem

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The big tin man pipes up, "*Ahem* Madam, perhaps you were not present within the nearby city blocks when I shouted about this not being a brothel any longer. This is the residence of a new Adventurer's Guild, which I am fairly certain is currently a house full of only literal dirt, and not metaphorical filth. Perhaps we can sit down to some biscuits and tea and discuss what your emergent problem is? If not, I will gladly boot you to the next block, if it please you."

Though not yet a member of the guild, Bigsley was eager to prove himself useful. He had even managed to remember where he was and what he was doing! This was a good omen, he thought, despite the fact that some very strange things had been going on lately.

Offline Sir Shadow

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Bartholomeow was blissfully unawares of the goings on upstairs and was instead trying to decide how the layout of the basement could best be used to their benefit and if additional levels were capable of being added...

Offline bhu

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The big tin man pipes up, "*Ahem* Madam, perhaps you were not present within the nearby city blocks when I shouted about this not being a brothel any longer. This is the residence of a new Adventurer's Guild, which I am fairly certain is currently a house full of only literal dirt, and not metaphorical filth. Perhaps we can sit down to some biscuits and tea and discuss what your emergent problem is? If not, I will gladly boot you to the next block, if it please you."

Though not yet a member of the guild, Bigsley was eager to prove himself useful. He had even managed to remember where he was and what he was doing! This was a good omen, he thought, despite the fact that some very strange things had been going on lately.


"DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM???  >:(

Offline littha

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Cusic is practising backflips.... it is making a lot of noise due to all the bells she is carrying.


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Offline Monotremeancer

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I'm going to have a look at these spiders I think. Are they really that poisonous? Bill asks of the squirrel.
I'm what's staring back from the abyss.
How come you guys never wave?

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Offline VennDygrem

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Responding to the cleric, he says, "If I had to guess, I'd say: Awfully Rude."

Offline RobbyPants

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Quote from: bhu in old thread
Orc: "I make people choke on their own teeth."

Elf: "I fuck violent older women.  I'm also pretty good  at seducing guards regardless of race/gender.  I've even screwed a hungry Mindflayer and kept my brain."
@ Orc: "Interesting... Are you some sort of toothomancer?"

@ Elf: "How about medusea? I know one who might be interested."
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Offline Nanshork

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Kintal looks at the woman that stormed in and bursts out laughing.

Offline bhu

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I'm going to have a look at these spiders I think. Are they really that poisonous? Bill asks of the squirrel.

"Yup.  Most spiders here are."

Offline bhu

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Quote from: bhu in old thread
Orc: "I make people choke on their own teeth."

Elf: "I fuck violent older women.  I'm also pretty good  at seducing guards regardless of race/gender.  I've even screwed a hungry Mindflayer and kept my brain."
@ Orc: "Interesting... Are you some sort of toothomancer?"

@ Elf: "How about medusea? I know one who might be interested."

They left already but we'll assume you snuck that in before they did so:

"Sure, but I have mami now.  We're kind of a thing."  More elf/orc smooching.

Offline bhu

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Kintal looks at the woman that stormed in and bursts out laughing.

SHe looks at you

sudden recognition as she points murderously

"YOOOOU!"

her confused and terrified looking assistants break out the cudgels

Offline jojolagger

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Ceusharath seems not to react to the priests assistants readying there weapons, and looks rather pleased.
Out of net access for a bit. Should be back late monday.

Offline VennDygrem

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"Madam, would you please keep the noise down? This is a quiet neighborhood, and this building is private property. I don't know what you're doing here, but some of us have sensitive hearing and you're making an awful racket."

Until this time, the metal man has been crouching, but at this he stands up, nearly 10-feet in height.

"And I was about to take a nap. You wouldn't want me getting cranky, now, would you?"

Offline bhu

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she stares down the man of steel

"Fool!  I am the High Priestess of Grizelda!  I could swat you like a fly."


Offline VennDygrem

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"Well, if you're going to be so rude, then your name might as well be 'mud.' As for your station, I couldn't give a rodent's droppings how important you are. When you get to be my age, those things tend to be a lot less impressive. Besides, I was reshaping reality when you weren't but knee-high to a dwarven shieldmaiden. As for your presence here, you are trespassing on private property and doing an awful lot of shouting. As I understand it, your authority means little more than squat outside of your jurisdiction. If you'd like to get anything out of your time here, I'd suggest you start being a little more polite and tell us what in blazes you're getting in a tizzy over."


Offline bhu

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"Do you know anything about the 'home' you've bought?"

Offline RobbyPants

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Quote from: bhu in old thread
Orc: "I make people choke on their own teeth."

Elf: "I fuck violent older women.  I'm also pretty good  at seducing guards regardless of race/gender.  I've even screwed a hungry Mindflayer and kept my brain."
@ Orc: "Interesting... Are you some sort of toothomancer?"

@ Elf: "How about medusea? I know one who might be interested."

They left already but we'll assume you snuck that in before they did so:

"Sure, but I have mami now.  We're kind of a thing."  More elf/orc smooching.

(click to show/hide)

Mustave lets them leave and snaps his fingers.

"Knew it couldn't be that easy."

He goes and stares curiously at the angry woman and metal guy.
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Offline Nanshork

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The demon kitty keeps giggling in a somewhat creepy manner.

Offline Flay Crimsonwind

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Hearing yelling downstairs, Zach hopes that his other compatriots could deal with it themselves. "I'll go too. We should take care of these spiders as quickly as possible, if they'll be that murderous a problem... which I don't doubt...

"You six don't have to come; feel free to settle in. I'll see about better chambers for you when we get this place sorted; I'll try to see about connecting some rooms for you all to this solar...

Bill, shall we? Or should we make sure nothing horrible is happening downstairs first?"
I'm here and ready to keep confusing the hell out of everyone I meet.