Author Topic: Dire Critters  (Read 35897 times)

Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #60 on: November 11, 2011, 10:59:41 PM »
Dire Butterfly
                      Huge Vermin
Hit Dice:             15d8+30 (97 hp)
Initiative:           +4
Speed:                20 ft. (4 squares), Fly 60 ft. (Good)
Armor Class:          18 (-2 Size, +4 Dex, +6 Natural), touch 12, flat-footed 14
Base Attack/Grapple:  +11/+23
Attack:               Proboscis +13 (1d8+4)
Full Attack:          Proboscis +13 (1d8+4)
Space/Reach:          15 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks:      -
Special Qualities:    Dark Vision 60 ft., Vermin traits, Scent, Toxic flesh
Saves:                Fort +11, Ref +9, Will +7
Abilities:            Str 18, Dex 18, Con 14, Int -, Wis 14, Cha 14
Skills:               Spot +10, Survival +2 (+10 Tracking or Orientation)
Feats:                -
Environment:          Temperate Plains or Forests
Organization:         Solitary
Challenge Rating:     5
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          16-32 HD (Gargantuan)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"What are we being paid for this Abner?"

Dire Butterflies are elephant sized.  No one knows how or why they came into existence, but drunkenness and Gawds are mentioned often.  Color and appearance varies, but they tend to suck down a lot of poisonous plants as young un's so biting one is a baaad idea.  They're fairly inoffensive as long as you don't get between them and food.

Toxic Flesh: Many of the plants commonly eaten by Dire Butterflies are quite toxic.  Anything attempting to bite or swallow (!) the Dire Butterfly that hits successfully must make a DC 19 Fortitude Save (Save DC is Constitution based) or be poisoned.  Initial and Secondary damage is 1d6 Con.

Skills: Dire Butterflies get a +8 Racial Bonus to Spot Checks, and to Survival Checks to track via scent or orient themselves.

Combat: Dire Butterflies ten to whack opponents with their proboscis once and then leave if their persistent in fighting back.



Giant Butterfly
"Good evening, and welcome to Mutual of Gnomeahaw's Wild Kingdom! As always, I'm your host Harlan Jergens!  Today on Wild Kingdom, we visit 'The Hall of Miscellaneous Bug Things'."

Poisonous Due To Their Diet
"Very scientific of you."

"Hey you two (beeps) can leave anytime..."

"No insult meant.  Surely men of our profession can indulge in some light ribbing?"

"You've been ribbing a little too much lately."

Caterpillars of Devastation
"When did we get a censor?"

"Why enlarge these?  You'd also have to enlarge their food sources."

"I had a client who was tired of people killing her beloved butterflies for their collections.  We forgot to consider what the caterpillars would be like..."
« Last Edit: August 28, 2022, 08:08:00 PM by bhu »

Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #61 on: November 14, 2011, 05:21:40 AM »
Dire Platypus
                      Medium Animal
Hit Dice:             2d8+2 (11 hp)
Initiative:           +2
Speed:                30 ft. (6 squares), Swim 30 ft.
Armor Class:          15 (+2 Dex, +3 Natural), touch 12, flat-footed 13
Base Attack/Grapple:  +1/+2
Attack:               Spur +3 melee (1d6+1 plus poison)
Full Attack:          2 Spurs +3 melee (1d6+1 plus poison)
Space/Reach:          5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Poison
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision, Hold Breath, Blindsense 30 ft.
Saves:                Fort +4, Ref +5, Will +1
Abilities:            Str 13, Dex 15, Con 13, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 10
Skills:               Escape Artist +6, Listen +2, Search +2, Spot +2, Swim +10
Feats:                Blind-Fighting, Ability Focus (Poison)(B), Weapon Finesse (B)
Environment:          Warm Aquatic
Organization:         Solitary, Pair, or Group (3-5)
Challenge Rating:     1
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          3-4 HD (Medium)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"Abner...the ducks here got fur..."

"Thems not ducks, thems Beavers."

"Beavers ain't got bills Abner..."

Dire Platypi are (almost) harmless water dwelling critters that simply wish to be left in peace.  And if they aren't, their venom will soon ensure that others DO leave them (perhaps not necessarily in peace).  Do not try to pet the fluffehs in the water childrens...

Poison (Ex): Injury, DC 14 Fortitude Save (Save DC is Constitution based), Initial damage is Paralysis for 1d4 minutes, Secondary damage is a -4 Penalty to all rolls for 24 hours, and a -2 to all Fortitude Saves for 1d6 days.

Hold Breath (Ex): The Dire Platypus can hold it's breath for (8x Con modifier) rounds before it risks drowning.

Blindsense (Ex): Dire Platypi can sense anything within 30 ft. as long as they are underwater.

Skills: Dire Platypi get a +8 Racial Bonus to Swim Checks, and may always take 10 on a Swim check.  They may take the Run Action while swimming in a straight line.  They also gain a +4 Racial Bonus to Escape Artist and Search Checks.

Combat: Dire Platypi usually swat their opponents with their spurs and hope the venom takes effect.  If it doesn't they may repeat a round or two before fleeing.  Considering it's effects, opponents had really better hope they make that Fort Save.



Giant Platypus
"Good evening, and welcome to Mutual of Gnomeahaw's Wild Kingdom! As always, I'm your host Harlan Jergens!  Today on Wild Kingdom we'll be looking at the Gawds sense of humor."

Aw, It's So Cute!
"Oh Jebus, I remember these."

"Bad experience Jim?"

"The first time Jim met a regular Platypus no one told me about the spurs."

"Oh, ouch.  I hope you had a good cleric."

Clerics Can't Help

"They kept trying to find spells to soothe pain.  For some reason no one thought of poison."

"That's how you tell your cleric is a rookie."

« Last Edit: August 21, 2022, 06:53:24 PM by bhu »

Offline Monotremeancer

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #62 on: November 16, 2011, 04:46:33 PM »
I never get tired of reading the phrase "Dire Platypus". Think you could do the echidna as well? *puppy eyes*
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Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #63 on: November 16, 2011, 06:06:21 PM »
how big?

Dire Echidna
                      Medium Animal
Hit Dice:             2d8+2 (11 hp)
Initiative:           +0
Speed:                20 ft. (4 squares), Burrow 20 ft.
Armor Class:          16 (+6 Natural), touch 10, flat-footed 16
Base Attack/Grapple:  +1/+3
Attack:               Claw +3 melee (1d6+2)
Full Attack:          2 Claws +3 melee (1d6+2)
Space/Reach:          5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      -
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision, Scent, Spiny Defense, Swarm Defense, Blindsight 10 ft.
Saves:                Fort +4, Ref +3, Will +1
Abilities:            Str 14, Dex 10, Con 12, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 8
Skills:              Hide +5, Listen +2, Spot +2, Survival +2
Feats:                Skill Focus (Hide)
Environment:          Warm Plains, Forests or Hills
Organization:         Solitary
Challenge Rating:     1
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Usually Neutral
Advancement:          3-4 HD (Medium)
Level Adjustment:     ---


"Awright lookee here Bert!  You and Abner wuz paid to kill this damn thing so get to killin'."

"Joseph you really shouldn't mention killin' critters right now we got our niece Sandy with us.  She's ... partial to critters.

"Ah don' give a damn if she braids their hair and shampoos their buttcheeks, I want this thang gone."

"HEED MAH CALL, OH WARRIORS OF THA FUR!"

"Aw crap...here we go..."

Y'all pretty much know what an Echidna is.  The Blindsight if from it's snouts ability to sense electrical impulses.

Spiny Defense (Ex): Anyone attacking the Dire Echidna with an Unarmed Strike, Grapple, or Natural Weapon takes (1d6 plus their own Str modifier) piercing damage.  When fighting using the Total Defense option it rolls into an armored ball raising it's Natural AC Bonus to +8.

Swarm Defense (Ex): Echidnas have DR 6/-, but only against Swarm attacks.

Skills: +4 Racial Bonus to Survival Checks to Track by Scent.  They gain a +4 Circumstance Bonus to Hide Checks in areas of thick undergrowth or if they are half buried near them.

Combat: Generally Echidnas flee, burrow, roll into a ball, or some other defensive tactic.  But their claws are quite strong if you are careless...




Giant Echidna
"Good evening, and welcome to Mutual of Gnomeahaw's Wild Kingdom! As always, I'm your host Harlan Jergens!  Today on Wild Kingdom we'll be looking at ... what is this exactly?"

Voted Most Likely To Survive A Bushfire
"I thught you knew your marsupials Harlan?"

"Echidnas are famous after all."

"Famous for what?"

"Ant killers.  I actually made these to help with our giant ant problem a while back."

The Can Sense Electrical Fields

"But giant ants are as big as this Echidna is."

"They were more 'biggie-sized' ants than true giants."

« Last Edit: August 21, 2022, 07:05:25 PM by bhu »

Offline Monotremeancer

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #64 on: November 17, 2011, 01:35:23 AM »
I was thinking pony-sized.  :D
I'm what's staring back from the abyss.
How come you guys never wave?

Please send me a PM if you give me kudos. I'm interested in what I'm doing right.

Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #65 on: November 17, 2011, 04:13:00 AM »
anything you disagree with or think i should add?

Offline Monotremeancer

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #66 on: November 17, 2011, 03:17:47 PM »
Not unless their penis (depending on your company's policies regarding animal penises, it may be NSFW) adds a bonus on intimidate checks  :D
I'm what's staring back from the abyss.
How come you guys never wave?

Please send me a PM if you give me kudos. I'm interested in what I'm doing right.

Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #67 on: November 20, 2011, 05:15:44 AM »
echidna updated

Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #68 on: November 26, 2011, 04:28:19 AM »
echidna just neds CR if you like it?

Offline Monotremeancer

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #69 on: November 26, 2011, 04:53:47 PM »
[Thick Aussie-accent]It's a beauty[/thick Aussie-accent]

Ergo: I am most pleased with it
I'm what's staring back from the abyss.
How come you guys never wave?

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Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #70 on: February 22, 2013, 01:30:56 AM »
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cBkWhkAZ9ds

                      Dire Namaquan Rain Frog
                      Tiny Animal
Hit Dice:             1d8 (4 hp)
Initiative:           +0
Speed:                20 ft. (4 squares), Burrow 10 ft.
Armor Class:          12 (+2 Size), touch 12, flat-footed 12
Base Attack/Grapple:  +0/-12
Attack:               Bite +0 melee (1d3-4)
Full Attack:          Bite +0 melee (1d3-4)
Space/Reach:          2 1/2 ft./0 ft.
Special Attacks:      Hysterically Un-Intimidating War Cry
Special Qualities:    Low-Light Vision
Saves:                Fort +2, Ref +2, Will +1
Abilities:            Str 3, Dex 10, Con 10, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 7
Skills:               Hide +8 (+16 in native terrain), Listen +3, Spot +3
Feats:                Weapon Finesse
Environment:          Temperate Deserts (found near shorelines close to water)
Organization:         Solitary
Challenge Rating:     1/8
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          ---
Level Adjustment:     ---

"SQUEEEEEE!"

"Aaaaw it's so cute."

"I think we'd better hurry.  Somethings headed this way, I can hear it in the forest."

The Dire Namaquan Desert Rain Frog is a cute, portly little frog that squeaks when upset.  Widely prized as pets, their popularity is the reason for their survival. 

Hysterically Un-Intimidating War Cry (Ex): When in danger, stressed, or it simply wishes to intimidate a predator the Desert Rain Frog unleashes it's mighty war cry.  Which unfortunately sounds like a rubber squeaky toy.  A squeaky toy whose sound echoes up to a mile away alerting any large predators in the region who often dine on either the frogs or small predators that also dine on the frogs.  In short the minute the frog squeaks, the PC's have 1d6 rounds before local predators of some sort arrive as they have adapted to listening for the little critters and can pinpoint their location with accuracy.  Basically it's a non-magical summons of a monster appropriate for the area and a moderately challenging CR to the party.

Skills: Rain Frog coloration closely resembles that of their native habitat, and gives them a +8 to Hide Checks while in that habitat.

Combat: Rain Frogs squeak.  If that doesn't intimidate their foe they try to run away and hide.  Unfortunately they aren't very fast, so they're basically quite defenseless apart from their ability to hide.



Giant Rain Frogs
"Good evening, and welcome to Mutual of Gnomeahaw's Wild Kingdom! As always, I'm your host Harlan Jergens!  Today on Wild Kingdom Jim and I will be showing you the most adorable thing  we've ever seen."

Difficult To Keep Alive
"These are pets too?"

"Yup, people think they're just the cutest thing ever.  Never mind the fact that keeping them alive is a monstrous effort."

"But...they're frogs.  That live in the desert.  They should be hardy..."


The All Frog Buffet

"As long as you keep them moist all should be well.."

"Sure, as long as they don't speak."

"They can talk?"

"No, but they have a war cry they try to use to intimidate you.  Predators recognize the sound and come running, because the frogs have no real defense other than camouflage."
« Last Edit: July 24, 2022, 07:20:03 PM by bhu »

Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #71 on: October 25, 2015, 09:37:44 PM »
Dire Beaver
                      Medium Animal
Hit Dice:             4d8+8 (26 hp)
Initiative:           +2
Speed:                30 ft. (6 squares), Swim 30 ft.
Armor Class:          16 (+2 Dex, +4 Natural), touch 12, flat-footed 14
Base Attack/Grapple:  +3/+5
Attack:               Bite +5 melee (2d4+3/18-20)
Full Attack:          Bite +5 melee (2d4+3/18-20)
Space/Reach:          5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Vicious Bite
Special Qualities:    Low-Light Vision, Scent, Hold Breath, Blindsense 30 ft.
Saves:                Fort +6, Ref +5, Will +2
Abilities:            Str 14, Dex 12, Con 14, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 10
Skills:              Craft (Dam-Building)+4, Listen +7, Spot +3, Swim +10, Survival +4
Feats:               Alertness, Endurance
Environment:          Cold or Temperate Forests
Organization:         Solitary, Pair or Family (2 Adults plus 1-6 kits of x Hit Dice)
Challenge Rating:     2
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          5-12 HD (Large)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"Whut we doin' t'day Abner."

"We're 'sposed ta evict a buncha Beavers.  Been makin' dams, messin' up the place."

"We should pass.  Ah hain't gettin' Beaver Fever."

"Relax, these here are Dire Beavers.  They don't get sick."

"How is giant as opposed ta sick any better?"

Dire Beavers are the size of small Black Bears, and quite a bit more aggressive.  The deforestation they sometimes cause in order to build their dams is often of concern, and Druids are often asked to "persuade" them to move on.

Vicious Bite (Ex): The Dire Beaver's bite threatens a Critical on a Natural 18-20.  It ignores the Hardness of wooden items, and the DR/- of wooden beings.

Hold Breath (Ex): A Dire Beaver can hold its breath for a number of rounds equal to 8 × its Constitution score before it risks drowning.

Blindsense (Ex): A Dire Beaver can locate creatures underwater within a 30-foot radius. This ability works only when the Dire Beaver is underwater.

Skills: Beavers gain a +4 Racial Bonus on Craft (Dam-Building) and Listen Checks.  They also gain a +8 Racial Bonus on Swim Checks and may always Take 10 on a Swim Check.

Combat: Beavers are very territorial, and have a vicious bite when necessary.  They are also frequent carriers of diseases, such as rabies, and should therefore be approached with caution.




Giant Beavers
"Good evening, and welcome to Mutual of Gnomeahaw's Wild Kingdom! As always, I'm your host Harlan Jergens!  Today on Wild Kingdom Jim and I will be learning more about Farmer Johns mysterious 'sabotage division'."

Very Aggressive For Being So Cute
"Who would you need to sabotage?"

"Other farming wizards.  We're a very competitive lot."

"Won't giant sized Beavers be a threat to everyone though?"


Fever!

"Can you actually train these things?"

"No but you can bribe them."

"Bribe them with what?"

"Clerics.  Much like their smaller cousins, giant Beavers are prone to disease."
« Last Edit: July 30, 2022, 09:05:31 PM by bhu »

Offline Braininthejar

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #72 on: October 26, 2015, 05:41:51 PM »
1 Wouldn't an auroch be a "dire cow"?

2 Dire penguin should have "swallow whole".


Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #73 on: October 27, 2015, 01:26:06 AM »
It would prolly be a cow with advanced HD. 

I'll have to revisit the penguin. 

Offline Braininthejar

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #74 on: October 28, 2015, 12:33:30 PM »
I suppose this is the best thread to ask about dinosaurs. I know there are official stats for ankylosaurus. What about gastonia?

Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #75 on: October 28, 2015, 03:45:57 PM »
I don't remember seeing any.  They haven't done many dinos since most of them would have similar stat blocks, just adjusted for size.

Offline Braininthejar

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #76 on: October 31, 2015, 08:14:51 PM »
Well, I guess it would have a slightly less damaging tail attack (slashing), and a chance to mangle an opponent who tries and fails to grapple it, That's probably it.

In other news, a picture you might use for a dire penguin



(yes, there are barbs on its tongue, to help keep the wriggling prey down.)

As for new dire creatures, how about a hagfish?



the jokes on its appearance aside, it is one of the weirdest creatures ever - half way between a fish and a lamprey, gifted with a mouth that opens sideways ...



It eats carrion, though it might nibble on wounded creatures too if it can get away with it, sometimes eating it's way inside the wound of something big. Curiously it can also absorb nutrients through the skin, just by swimming past floating corpses.

It is best known for its mucus - released in a cloud when under attack and rapidly coagulating in water - not a problem if you can hold your breath, but a huge bummer for anything with gills. The hagfish can twist itself into an overhand knot to pull the mucus off its body - the combined effect makes it quite effective at escaping grapples.

Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #77 on: November 01, 2015, 02:49:36 AM »
hagfish and penguin revisit it is

Offline Braininthejar

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #78 on: November 01, 2015, 05:40:08 AM »


(I keep promising myself to write a rewrite for all animals - they are much more amazing than the monster manual gives them credit for)
« Last Edit: November 01, 2015, 08:34:17 AM by Braininthejar »

Offline bhu

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Re: Dire Critters
« Reply #79 on: November 02, 2015, 03:12:02 AM »
Dire Hagfish
                      Large Animal (Aquatic)
Hit Dice:             7d8+7 (38 hp)
Initiative:           +3
Speed:                Swim 60 ft. (12 squares)
Armor Class:          15 (-1 Size, +3 Dex, +3 Natural), touch 12, flat-footed 12
Base Attack/Grapple:  +5/+11
Attack:               Bite +6 melee (1d8+3)
Full Attack:          Bite +6 melee (1d8+3)
Space/Reach:          10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Torque
Special Qualities:    Slime Defense, Mindless, Sluggish Metabolism, Blindsense, Scent, Blind
Saves:                Fort +6, Ref +8, Will +3
Abilities:            Str 15, Dex 17, Con 13, Int -, Wis 12, Cha 2
Skills:               Escape Artist +7, Swim +10
Feats:                ---
Environment:          Cold Aquatic
Organization:         Solitary or Colony (10-30)
Challenge Rating:     3
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          8-12 HD (Large), 13-24 HD (Huge)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"Our one chance ta go fishin' in ages and it has ta be these 'bominations.  I tell ya Abner I really do think were cursed."

Hagfish are truly bizarre creatures, alone among the Animal Kingdom as the only creatures possessing a skull but no vertebral column.  They are scavengers who scour the area of corpses, even feeding on injured creatures from the inside.  Despite their disgusting nature they are often used as food and clothing.

Torque (Ex): Hagfish use a twisting maneuver to rip prey open, to get inside them.  If the Dire Hagfish makes a Full Attack, and succeeds with it's Bite attack, it automatically does maximum damage.

Slime Defense (Ex): Once per Minute the Dire Hagfish can emit a 20 ft. x 20 ft. x 20 ft cloud of slime.  The cloud provides Total Concealment, and all Grapple Checks made within it receive a -10 Circumstance Penalty.  It also clogs the gills of other creatures with the Aquatic Subtype, who immediately begin to Suffocate (see the DMG).  The Dire Hagfish itself is immune to this suffocation effect.  The slime cloud persists for a number of rounds equal to the Dire Hagfishes Constitution score.

Sluggish Metabolism (Ex): Unlike normal, a Dire Hagfish can go three months without food as opposed to three days.

Blindsense (Ex): A Dire Hagfish can locate creatures underwater within a 30-foot radius. This ability works only when the Dire Hagfish is underwater.

Blind (Ex): The Dire Hagfishes eyes are little used and extremely ineffective, making it all but blind.  Attacks relying on vision such as purely visual illusions or flashes of light have no effect on them.  They are used to being Blind, and take none of the penalties otherwise associated with the condition.

Skills: Hagfish gain a +4 Racial Bonus on Escape Artist Checks.  They also gain a +8 Racial Bonus on Swim Checks, and may always Take 10 on a Swim Check.

Combat: Most Hagfish aren't particularly aggressive, and are perfectly content with carrion.  Most will blast opponents with slime and flee, but there are a few stubborn ones.



Giant Hagfish
"Good evening, and welcome to Mutual of Gnomeahaw's Wild Kingdom! As always, I'm your host Harlan Jergens!  Today on Wild Kingdom Jim and I will be showing you an abomination."

Mostly Scavengers.  Mostly.
"I'm afraid I agree with Harlan on this one."

"Gentlemen, open your minds please.  They're great for clearing out the pools of dead matter."

"They don't seem to be picky about living matter either."


A Horrible Way To Die

"I've never seen a fish devoured from the inside."

"I'll admit, some of them are a tad aggressive..."

« Last Edit: August 14, 2022, 07:27:13 PM by bhu »