Author Topic: Kuro's Improbable Tales  (Read 106088 times)

Offline ariasderros

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #280 on: February 26, 2013, 11:38:31 AM »
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And people say I'm dark and morbid.


Anywho... the speech you (Kuro) gave reminds me of the "you have two legs, so use them" speech in FMA.
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Offline nijineko

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #281 on: February 26, 2013, 12:45:08 PM »
i think i'm going to start thinking of a certain someone as just 'lost' from now on.  =P

Offline awaken_D_M_golem

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #282 on: February 26, 2013, 05:19:51 PM »
Radio News-ish Reporter:

We've taken calls from 3 witnesses to this incredible story.  A guy came out of nowhere, leaped over the baby carriage, flipping the baby out of it, landed and immediately jumped with one hand on the Mom, pushing her out of the way of the incoming Meteor!  He caught the baby one handed, and kicked the carriage all in one move.  The meteor was redirected by the carriage into a building used as a local Gang hideout, killing 5 mid level couriers and lighting a Box Truck of marijuana on fire.  Then he hopped on a city bus to go to school.  The mom was too panicked to give a report, and the police thought every possible witness was stoned because of the fire.  But folks, we believe this is a true story, and could prove it if we knew his name ... this just in, local shopping centers are sold out of the brand of baby carriage.
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Offline Kuroimaken

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #283 on: February 26, 2013, 05:28:36 PM »
i think i'm going to start thinking of a certain someone as just 'lost' from now on.  =P
I have no idea what you mean.
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Offline nijineko

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #284 on: February 26, 2013, 06:54:36 PM »
i think i'm going to start thinking of a certain someone as just 'lost' from now on.  =P
I have no idea what you mean.

i was referring to soro_lost, actually. that was my way of not appreciating the comment made by said individual.

Offline Kuroimaken

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #285 on: February 26, 2013, 09:03:26 PM »
i think i'm going to start thinking of a certain someone as just 'lost' from now on.  =P
I have no idea what you mean.

i was referring to soro_lost, actually. that was my way of not appreciating the comment made by said individual.

Well, that went completely over my head, as you can tell.

But... yeah. I'd rather not comment. I appreciate the occasional dark humor, so I can't exactly judge.
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Offline awaken_D_M_golem

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #286 on: February 27, 2013, 06:23:56 PM »
Besides ... what Parent hasn't wanted to pull the plug on their child, on occasion?


 :fo ;) ... aww ... honey I love you  :love you know that don't you.
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Offline SorO_Lost

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #287 on: February 27, 2013, 07:34:09 PM »
I'm glad at least a few people got it and liked it.

Offline bobthe6th

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #288 on: February 27, 2013, 11:49:58 PM »
Something minor today, compared to, y'know, palm striking cars.

So I'm walking up to work, and we have this little space between the building and the fence proper that's kinda like a mini-garden with wooden logs people can sit down on. Lots of employees come there to relax in between shifts, and they usually gather there and talk at length during lunch break. I'm approaching a group of coworkers to greet them, and one of them, a smoker, is telling a story in a very enthusiastic fashion with lit cigarette in hand. As I approach, she suddenly approaches what appears to be the climax in the story, when her cigarette slips out between her fingers and flies in my direction.

Towards my right eye.

Good old reflexes catch up. I weave my head to the side while my hand catches the flying butt right in the palm, and puts it out. Between the adrenaline rush and the suddenness of my own reaction, there is no pain.

I'd gotten a cigarette burn before. Once, I had a very heated discussion with a smoker, took the lit cigarette and put it out in my upper palm so the attention would be on my words instead of a cancerstick. It hurt, it burned for days, and my skin eventually healed.

When I open up my hand, I see the butt is well and truly squashed. I brush the ash aside to inspect what I figure is a burn wound right in the middle of my palm, which I don't feel yet but probably will in a few.

Nothing. Not even a black spot. Hell, not even a BROWN spot.

My coworkers rush to see if I'm okay, and to dismiss their concerns, I tell them the cinder must have caught in an empty space when I clenched my hand. My colleague profusely apologizes, but I tell her not to worry about it.


Ok, this I got! Its a really sweet magicians trick. Not sure how he does it exactly, but he would put out a lit cig in a T shirt without putting so much as a mark on it. I think it has something to do with generating a vacuum to put out the fire?
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Offline nijineko

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #289 on: February 28, 2013, 12:53:39 AM »
I'm glad at least a few people got it and liked it.

i got it the first time, and didn't like it the first time.

Something minor today, compared to, y'know, palm striking cars.

So I'm walking up to work, and we have this little space between the building and the fence proper that's kinda like a mini-garden with wooden logs people can sit down on. Lots of employees come there to relax in between shifts, and they usually gather there and talk at length during lunch break. I'm approaching a group of coworkers to greet them, and one of them, a smoker, is telling a story in a very enthusiastic fashion with lit cigarette in hand. As I approach, she suddenly approaches what appears to be the climax in the story, when her cigarette slips out between her fingers and flies in my direction.

Towards my right eye.

Good old reflexes catch up. I weave my head to the side while my hand catches the flying butt right in the palm, and puts it out. Between the adrenaline rush and the suddenness of my own reaction, there is no pain.

I'd gotten a cigarette burn before. Once, I had a very heated discussion with a smoker, took the lit cigarette and put it out in my upper palm so the attention would be on my words instead of a cancerstick. It hurt, it burned for days, and my skin eventually healed.

When I open up my hand, I see the butt is well and truly squashed. I brush the ash aside to inspect what I figure is a burn wound right in the middle of my palm, which I don't feel yet but probably will in a few.

Nothing. Not even a black spot. Hell, not even a BROWN spot.

My coworkers rush to see if I'm okay, and to dismiss their concerns, I tell them the cinder must have caught in an empty space when I clenched my hand. My colleague profusely apologizes, but I tell her not to worry about it.


Ok, this I got! Its a really sweet magicians trick. Not sure how he does it exactly, but he would put out a lit cig in a T shirt without putting so much as a mark on it. I think it has something to do with generating a vacuum to put out the fire?

perhaps his initial grab was soft-fist style, and when he tensed up at the last instant, the egress of air out of his palm extinguished it and blew away the ash?
« Last Edit: February 28, 2013, 12:57:10 AM by nijineko »

Offline Kuroimaken

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #290 on: March 11, 2013, 10:20:25 AM »
Nothing fancy today. I was coming back from a run, and when I took off my sneakers I noticed a smell like something burnt.

Upon inspecting my socks, I discovered I somehow created enough friction to burn a small hole through one of them.
« Last Edit: March 13, 2013, 02:05:43 PM by Kuroimaken »
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Offline nijineko

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #291 on: March 13, 2013, 12:31:21 PM »
...created enough attrition to burn....

after all, friction is just an attrition of molecules lost due to heat exchange between two formerly stable structures. ^^

Offline Kuroimaken

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #292 on: March 13, 2013, 02:05:19 PM »
Fix'd for the corrected term.  :p
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Offline Kuroimaken

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #293 on: March 15, 2013, 10:12:34 AM »
Can you believe they still haven't fixed the hole on the ground from my run-in with the minibus?

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Offline SorO_Lost

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #294 on: March 16, 2013, 12:59:11 PM »
That hole is pretty round, did you fall ass first?

Offline Kuroimaken

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #295 on: March 16, 2013, 02:01:17 PM »
That hole is pretty round, did you fall ass first?

You're assuming I fell.

I didn't.
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Offline SorO_Lost

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #296 on: March 16, 2013, 02:53:54 PM »
That was pretty defensive there.

I guess this thread wasn't as advertised.

Offline Kuroimaken

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #297 on: March 16, 2013, 03:02:37 PM »
Well, I thought of answering with "Ooo, burn! Did you stay up all night thinking that one up?" or making a "Yo mama's so fat" joke, but you know...

*puts fedora on*

...I got too much class for that.
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Offline SorO_Lost

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #298 on: March 16, 2013, 03:19:39 PM »
I was up all night, felt it from here.

Your sister was pretty worried, she thought it was you.

Offline Kuroimaken

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Re: Kuro's Improbable Tales
« Reply #299 on: March 16, 2013, 03:32:43 PM »
Leave it to a man with half-boiled insults to get his geography wrong.

To be honest, SorO, I don't care what you think.

And frankly, I wouldn't care if no one else believed me, either.

I know my truth, and that's good enough for me.
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