Incarnate might be better for you, I don't know. INcarnate has the Dragonfire Adept melds (I think that they're in Dragon Magic, but not sure...the web enhancement?), and requires Wis. Your con score (not modifier) determines how many you can shape at once though, so it is somewhat important, but you only need a 19 to get full melding. That's actually the only required, the wis only does DCs and such, so you don't need it if not going for the DCs. Totemists require con for the DCs. The stats you need as an INcarnum user are whatever you're using to play with (str, dex with Weapon Finesse, wis with Intuitive Attack or Zen Archery, etc.) and then a minimum of 19 con by level 20. So basically, just play it like one of your other classes, and then have the added benefit of soulmelds. Use things that don't directly affect your combat effectiveness, but increase your utility, like the Fellmist Robe giving you a miss chance, or the Crystal Helm giving you a will save boost and charm immunity.
