Author Topic: Worst 5 words a DM could say  (Read 123751 times)

Offline bhu

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #60 on: February 29, 2012, 10:53:20 PM »
"What the Hell is MRSA?"

Offline SorO_Lost

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #61 on: March 02, 2012, 08:26:28 PM »

"Meet Ichigo, he's a Shinigami."
When meeting a new NPC.

"Insert a quarter to continue."
After you die, horribly and unfairly.

"Familiars are very over powered."
DM on balance.

"This game needs more cowbell."
DM hooked on the wrong wiki.

"Barkeep has six Divine Ranks"
DM on NPC interaction in the local tavern.

"You see 0 invisible traps"
DM on Search results.

"Shut up, we're not friends."
DM on teamwork.

Offline Libertad

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #62 on: March 02, 2012, 10:59:32 PM »
"Religious people have Intelligence caps."
~Aggressively atheist DM I had the misfortune of hearing about.

"And the same for women."
At which point the game table devolved into a flame war.
« Last Edit: March 02, 2012, 11:04:03 PM by Libertad »

Offline littha

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #63 on: March 02, 2012, 11:10:17 PM »
"Stats are 3d6, in order"
-Something one of my DMs actually said, after you chose your class too... I ended up playing a Druid with 4 Wis. I was still better than most of the rest of the party even without the spellcasting.

Offline bhu

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #64 on: March 02, 2012, 11:45:45 PM »
"Fighters Don't need magic items."

Offline JohnnyMayHymn

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #65 on: March 02, 2012, 11:48:11 PM »
"Now, roll for anal circumference..."
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Offline phaedrusxy

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #66 on: March 03, 2012, 12:02:30 AM »
That's what your Mom said.
I don't pee messages into the snow often , but when I do , it's in Cyrillic with Fake Viagra.  Stay frosty my friends.

Offline ariasderros

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #67 on: March 04, 2012, 12:49:31 AM »
"Now, roll for anal circumference..."

"Next Session: Meet the Arseplomancer"
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Offline Balmas

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #68 on: March 04, 2012, 10:30:18 AM »
"Sorry.  You can't do that."

"The DM is your God."

"Guess what I just rolled."

"Now hold on a second!  Eternal chaos comes with chocolate rain, you guys! Chocolate rain!" ~Pinkie Pie

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Offline bhu

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #69 on: March 04, 2012, 02:27:15 PM »
"Fuck gaming, lets talk politics."

Offline Surreal

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #70 on: March 04, 2012, 05:46:56 PM »
Actual lines from DMs...

"you critically fumble your loincloth"

"no dragonborn, they're too overpowered"

Offline RobbyPants

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #71 on: March 04, 2012, 07:52:35 PM »
"Core only. It's more balanced."
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Offline Libertad

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #72 on: March 05, 2012, 01:02:27 AM »
"Core only. It's more balanced."

"Core only.  I hate munchkins."

"Core only.  Wizards > Fighters."

"Druids aren't overpowered, silly goose!"

"My adventures contain S&M.  Problems?"

"Dominate Person.  Now remove clothes."

"Dragon sex is so hot!"
« Last Edit: March 05, 2012, 01:16:01 AM by Libertad »

Offline Jackinthegreen

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #73 on: March 10, 2012, 02:52:05 AM »
"Let me use my calculator..."

Offline bhu

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #74 on: March 10, 2012, 12:02:10 PM »
"Elves are Gay.  No exceptions."

Offline ariasderros

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #75 on: March 10, 2012, 12:07:03 PM »
I'm going to say this in both threads.

Anything on Mr. Welch's list.


(It is 5 words, just not a quote in and of itself.)
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Offline InnaBinder

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #76 on: March 11, 2012, 09:00:03 PM »
"Let's play Spawn of Fashan!"
Arguing on the internet is like running in the Special Olympics.  Even if you win, you're still retarded.

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Offline McBeardly

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #77 on: March 12, 2012, 04:38:36 AM »
"No splatbooks, they are overpowered"

Offline The_Laughing_Man

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #78 on: March 13, 2012, 01:12:41 PM »
"Flying is not allowed."

"It's more balanced this way."

"There is no teleportation either."

"Prestidigation is op. It's out."

"These spells are banned."

"No ropetricking. Camp by the fire."

"Bag of holding is banned."

Offline Lars

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM could say
« Reply #79 on: March 19, 2012, 09:38:07 AM »
"The final boss is Pun-pun."

"The story is all Giovanni." (Toredor would be just as bad)

"new guys are Brazilian Cops" :)

Tonight: "Adventures designed by Gary Gygax" (I will so go Tomb of Horrors on my PC's someday)

Why brazilian cops are bad!
(like in legendary bad)
(click to show/hide)

Thanks for reminding me of that story