Author Topic: Worst 5 words a DM can hear  (Read 43380 times)

Offline Balmas

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Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« on: March 10, 2012, 01:46:22 AM »
This is a sister thread to this thread, but from the other side of the screen.  What are the absolutely worst words a DM can hear coming from his players?  Whether they be scary, inventive, or just plain wierd, let's see 'em.

I'll kick this off...

"Okay everybody, let's split up!"

"I have a brilliant plan!"

"I'm playing a barbarian/wizard!"
"Now hold on a second!  Eternal chaos comes with chocolate rain, you guys! Chocolate rain!" ~Pinkie Pie

My Monster Manual lies to me:  it states that a pegasus is white or occasionally brown when everyone knows that pegasi ought to be blue with rainbow stripes.

Offline Jackinthegreen

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #1 on: March 10, 2012, 02:49:04 AM »
"Toughness is a worthwhile feat."

Offline Balmas

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #2 on: March 10, 2012, 04:27:33 AM »
"Yes, I'm a munchkin.  And?"
"Now hold on a second!  Eternal chaos comes with chocolate rain, you guys! Chocolate rain!" ~Pinkie Pie

My Monster Manual lies to me:  it states that a pegasus is white or occasionally brown when everyone knows that pegasi ought to be blue with rainbow stripes.

Offline InnaBinder

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #3 on: March 10, 2012, 08:36:37 AM »
"I made a Kender Paladin!"
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Offline Prime32

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #4 on: March 10, 2012, 09:13:10 AM »
^
"I made a kobold paladin."
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Offline veekie

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #5 on: March 10, 2012, 09:20:02 AM »
"Nudge me when its combat"

Objectively worst.
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Offline ariasderros

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #6 on: March 10, 2012, 09:31:16 AM »
"Okay everybody, let's split up!"
"I have a brilliant plan!"

Oh, is he in your campaign too?

"Yes, I'm a munchkin.  And?"

Oh, he does get around.

(referring to someone IRL)

"I take off my shirt"
"She drunkenly says 'who-hoo, PARTY!'"

Both were from an actual game.
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Offline RobbyPants

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #7 on: March 10, 2012, 10:07:18 AM »
"My character doesn't speak common"

(this lead to a game breaking up for me)
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Offline ariasderros

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #8 on: March 10, 2012, 10:30:34 AM »
"Can I just Ret-con that?"
(From the player referenced above, at least twice a session)
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Offline bhu

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #9 on: March 10, 2012, 12:00:16 PM »
"Fighters are obviously more powerful."

Offline ariasderros

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #10 on: March 10, 2012, 12:07:14 PM »
I'm going to say this in both threads.

Anything on Mr. Welch's list.


(It is 5 words, just not a quote in and of itself.)
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Offline sirpercival

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #11 on: March 10, 2012, 12:16:51 PM »
"My guy is half Cthulhu"
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Offline ariasderros

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #12 on: March 10, 2012, 12:25:54 PM »
"So I read this thread..."
(Can go well, which it usually does for one of my players. Can go very, very bad, which it does for the rest of my players.)
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Offline ariasderros

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #13 on: March 10, 2012, 12:30:26 PM »
The one that pissed me off the most.
"It's your fault I died"
"You should have nerfed it"
- after his character died, because he went off on his own in a site-based adventure, after having been warned by me many times, and by the other players too. Is the same one that has now resorted to being a munchkin.
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Offline Balmas

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #14 on: March 10, 2012, 03:36:00 PM »
"Okay everybody, let's split up!"
"I have a brilliant plan!"

Oh, is he in your campaign too?

Heck, that describes all of the PCs in my game.

Actual in game comment, said to another friend talking:
"Stop ruining the flavor text!"
"Now hold on a second!  Eternal chaos comes with chocolate rain, you guys! Chocolate rain!" ~Pinkie Pie

My Monster Manual lies to me:  it states that a pegasus is white or occasionally brown when everyone knows that pegasi ought to be blue with rainbow stripes.

Offline awaken_D_M_golem

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #15 on: March 10, 2012, 03:57:25 PM »

Pseudonatural Cat drank Confusion Potion ...  :flirt
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Offline ariasderros

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #16 on: March 11, 2012, 03:26:34 AM »
Pseudonatural Cat drank Confusion Potion ...  :flirt
bhu?

"What's my attack bonus again?"
- one of my players who is bad at remembering the basics.
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Offline bhu

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #17 on: March 11, 2012, 05:30:33 PM »
"I'm playing a gay Paladin."

Offline littha

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #18 on: March 11, 2012, 06:23:39 PM »
"Is BoEF an allowed Source?"

Offline RobbyPants

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Re: Worst 5 words a DM can hear
« Reply #19 on: March 11, 2012, 08:55:18 PM »
"I'm gonna play another monk."

(this player believed that monks were the best.)

"I'm playing a gay Paladin."
I had a player do this once.
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