Little one? Carrying me? Oh now he's just begging for it..
Thespias raises his voice and calls out in a challenging tone dripping of disdain as the Tiefling and his companions pass them.
"My good man, you must surely mistake me for some dim-witted horny mongrel of a braggart. I might be shorter than you, but I'm fairly certain I'm twice your size where it really counts, you pox-faced piece of refuse. While I have no need for my friends here to be able to keep up with the best of them, I can definitely understand how you would get the idea to get someone to carry your little one. Tell me, does your lumbering ox of a companions here help to lift up the withered little thing for you?
Because I'm sure he helps you carry all your valuables, regardless of weight, size or worth. As a true friend would, naturally. I'm sure it's nice to be around people who don't judge you, with all the obvious flaws you exhibit physically. Not to mention the mind-boggling dung heap that must be your mind."
He sneers at the Tiefling in contempt.
"Now run along like a good little boy and see whatever glimpse of heaven your gold can buy you, 'cause as sure as there's Demons scheming, I'm certain there's no female on two legs and breathing who would accept you otherwise. I'm sure you are used to the inescapable vomit they're retch up on you after you've touched them so I suppose my advice to keep a towel handy is unnecessary. I'm sure you need a towel for your needs most of the time anyway.
Tespias draws a new breath.
"Fear not my eye-goungingly ugly man, I'm sure you can stick your flag in less picky soil if you really take the time to whisper sweet nothings into the ear of your loved one. Remember to cover your mouth though, I can feel your breath all the way over here and the smell would have even an Otyugh go "Not even I would go there". If you follow my advice I'm sure you'll eventually find a female to accept you for the 5 seconds it takes you to finish. I'm thinking probably something. . . bovine."
The halflings speech grows more acidic by the second.
"I've also been told by a exceptionally repugnant individual, do not fear he looks much better than you, that the air escaping the lungs from the recently deceased sounds much like "yeeess" when you push down on them. Though I'm sure you already know all about these things being such a charming. . . man."
Thespias raises his tone at the end of the reply, almost making it sound like a question.
"Actually, speaking of scheming demons, I must say I'm rather disappointed in your manners. Being crude is no way to charm a lady, though I suspect you are doing the best you can with your special flavour of inbred, idiotic heritage. My apologies, I'm sure that's an insult to swines everywhere"